my child isnt just naughty! how do i prove that there is more to his behaviour?

[mummytogo]

my 6 year old boy has had numerous behavioural and learning problems for a few years now. i had him tested for adhd last year but found the head teacher didnt back me up and the results came back inconclusive. my child still has various problems and his teacher is growing increasingly concerned.i just dont seem to be able to get the help and struggle to get him tested any advice?

I think you should repost this on the special needs children board[ just underneath aibu].

There are loads of knowledgable people on there who might be able to help you.

go to the GP and express your worries - they should be able to help refer him on. ask to meet the with the school SEN lead teacher/ht again - what do they think the cause of his difficulties are?

who tested him?

consultant paed or gp just got you and school to fill in snap iv checksheet?

or did you fork out for a full assessment from private child psych?

what tests were done?

you have the ct on board - did she fill out the snap iv?

why was the ht involved? does she spend a lot of time with your ds?

we went thru paediatrician and school and they did the adhd test form which gets me and school to compare notes and its then checked against each other to flag major signs and problems. but as i informed the paeditrician if ound some of the answers the school gave were not the same as what school had discussed with me. ive been told to go through the doctors but numerous people which is what im in the process of doing now but just wondered if there is any other way as i worry due to him moving up to the primary school in september and still not being ready for it.

OP I had similar problem with my DS1 school just labelled him as naughty and a liar!
I took him to GP after school excluded him for a week and told he I wanted him referred to someone, anyone who could help. She referred him to child pyschologist at local hospital. We had a meeting with her and I had to go over every little detail of DS1's behaviour at school and at home. She then referred him to city hospital who diagnosed DS with ASD. But she did warn me that if I went after a Statement the school would not be happy as it would mean more paperwork for them. Tough!
Keep pushing for your child. It will be worth it in the end.

You can go to a private paed if you can afford it.

Otherwise you just have to try again, and again, and again.

Come and join us on the SN board and you will find out how long some people had to wait to get a dx :(

You can also move school and find one with a better SENCO and HT.

if they did snap iv (and it sounds like it), then your immediate option is to pay privately for a full assessment yourself (not just snap iv, that really only hihglights whether other assessment should be done). still don't get why ht though? checklist should be done by ct, not ht.

ds1 had snap iv done by school and us a year or two ago and it was inconclusive. and again this year.

we paid for an assessment by child psych and he has a dx.

so, either you keep pushing, or you fork out yourself. sometimes it takes a good few years. if you can afford it, i'd take the short cut. in the interim, make lots of notes and start researching to see where you think he fits. what problems does he have? start to identify problems and work on solutions.

even if he was dx with adhd, short of meds, there would be no magic cure. he'd still have it, and it would still be a case of identifying problems and trying to find solutions. and none of it is easy. you know there's 'something', so try different methods and strategies and see what works.

do you think adhd? or do you think he's on the spectrum somewhere? you haven't said what problems he has, but there are lots of organisations that can give you ideas if you think oyu know where he sits, until school catch up. and if you are better informed, then you stand a better chance of persuading school as well.

i know it's depressing, but with borderline stuff, you often end up being the expert yourself. you can't rely on professionals. so you have to take the initiative and get on with it. it's knackering, but it's pretty much the only way to get some support. nothing will be done unless you fight for it, educate yourself, and then keep battling until ds gets what he needs.

well i think its either adhd or dyspraxia and from my research he ticks nearly all the boxes for both. my friend use to be a behavioural management teacher and she thinks it could be both and told me to go to the school and keep trying to get him help but they dont seem to be equipped or qualified for special ed needs.thank you all for your advice im going to go thru the doctors and keep trying if that dont work then maybe il have to save up for a private assessment

Even when he gets a dx, school still won't be equipped or qualified.

So you need a two pronged attack.

1. Keep trying and trying and trying to get a dx.

1. Keep trying and trying and trying to work with school and get school to help him.

I'm really sorry.

A dx won't bring anything with it, besides a 'label'. The label is helpful, and is what he needs. But school will still be the same school.

All schools are equipped and qualified for sen. That's why they have a senco and a budget for it. But you have identified the issue yourself. You have to be the driving force (this is what your friend was trying to say, I think) because the pressure on the system for that funding is fierce. And the children competing for it have varied and in some cases severe needs. So the onus is on you to prove that ds needs access to it.

Right. So you think it's ADHD or dyspraxia. You make a long list of how he fits each, and you go back to the paed or gp. If snap testing has already ruled out ADHD, and the paed won't follow up, then either you have to pay for a private test through a child psych, or you have to leave it for a year, collect more evidence, and go back and ask for a repeat (ad infinitum). Probably three years if school persist?

Dyspraxia - as you haven't sought help for that yet, go to the paed with a list of issues which require assessment. Ask them to refer for an OT assessment. Waiting list are usually quite long - they can be in excess of six months just for assessment, and then some areas have a wait list for therapy, if ds fits into whatever bracket they deem to treat in your area. Or you could pay for a private OT assessment. Sometimes children with dyspraxia aren't given much in the way of therapy, sometimes they are, depends on severity. Some areas have great OT and physio programmes. But again, only for the most severe.

If he has already been seen by the paed and discharged, there is v little chance of the gp doing the referrals. The one usually cancels the other out in the grand scheme of things. Usually the the developmental paed that makes the call rather than the generalist. But you might find a helpful gp.

And once you've got the reports that say ds has x dx (or diagnoses) then you have to liaise to school to work out what support he needs and they are willing to provide.

At a guess, I'd say you spent a grand and got a wobble cushion and a prescription for meds. And an acknowledgement that he's dyspraxic not clumsy. Anything else will still be up to you to fight for.

I'm being deliberately blatant about how hard this is going to be. A label (or two) will make very little difference in real terms. It will just give you a piece of paper to go into battle with. As your friend knows, your interaction with school is what will make the difference for ds. A dx will help, but it won't solve the problems.