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Behaviour/development

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Original poster

shocked by sons text message

50 replies

wheelybird · 25/01/2012 13:35

this morning we were getting ready for school and ds1 (10yrs) asked if he could have 40p and i agreed. then ds3 (18mths) was having a tantrum refusing to put her coat on so i asked ds1 and ds2 (4yrs) if they would put on their coats while i dealt with her. instead they had a fight. so they both got told off and ds1 told he could not have 40p. after a few minutes of general stroppiness he left to walk to scool by himself while i took ds2 to school. 15 mins later ds1 sent me a text saying...
u suck completely. give me 20p or ill punch you in the face.

i am incredibly shocked and angry about this. it is not something he has done before. he does have a bad temper but normally directs it at himself, never threatening anyone else. i can deal with disciplining him about this, but am floored by his lack of respect and violent threat. do you think he really feels like that?

OP posts:

wahwahwah · 25/01/2012 15:11

Sounds like an angry text to me. He is probably seriously regretting it and dreading coming home.

I am sure he doesnt feel like this and his temper just got the better of him. It is a random amount though -why would he be so upset about not getting it? I think someone pointed out that perhaps he is being bullied?

I would pick him up normally, as if nothing had happened, then pull out my phone and say 'oh I have a text from you'. Let him open up and see how the land lies before you decide how/if to discipline.

nickelhasababy · 25/01/2012 15:14

my phone doesn't say if it's been forwarded.

boredandrestless · 25/01/2012 15:18

It could be that he is being bullied.

I would talk to him and unless that is a message he has forwarded to you that a bully has sent to him, then I would be punishing him.

Didn't you ask why he wanted 40p? Seems an odd amount, does he usually ask you for money?

Greythorne · 25/01/2012 15:21

If the text was meant for you, he needs a serious punishment and a clear explanation of why this is very wrong and unacceptale. He needs to show he has made amends before privileges are reinstated.

If he is being bullied, he needs a lighter punishment and a clear explanation of why this is very wrong and unacceptable.

If he is the bully, you need to get to the bottom of it urgently, as he is now attempting to bully you. Worst case scenario which requires serious consequences and punishment.

Sorry yiu are going through this.

exoticfruits · 25/01/2012 15:28

I would get to the bottom of it, it could easily be a text sent to him.
Either way I would take the phone off him until further notice. (fairly easy in my case because I wouldn't let a 10yr old have one in the first place).

minceorotherwise · 25/01/2012 15:35

Poorbuthappy may be right, that's was what I thought. Maybe it was a message sent to him (by a bully) and he forwarded it to you to show you what had happened?? Not all phones show that a message has been forwarded. Would explain why it was 20p????

elvisaintdead · 25/01/2012 16:26

OP is he home from school yet? Curious as to the outcome of this one and what on earth your DS was thinking.

chocolateyclur · 25/01/2012 16:44

Hope you're getting some resolution. Agreed that 40p seems a strange amount to request?

msrisotto · 25/01/2012 16:57

If it was a threat from someone else, why would he forward it straight on with no explanation? That doesn't make sense. Have a chat with him before deciding what to do.

minceorotherwise · 25/01/2012 19:24

None of it makes sense really, just clutching at any straws which indicate he hadn't intended to send that to his mum :(

AngiBolen · 25/01/2012 19:27

I've been waiting hours for the OP to come back.

Personally I presume he off loaded his plight to a friend who texted you. 10 year olds don't always think through their actions.

AngiBolen · 25/01/2012 19:28

40p isn't a weird amount. It gets you exactly a slice of cheese on toast and a drink at snack time at DSs school.

youarekidding · 25/01/2012 19:30

I wouldn't be suspicious about 40p being a random amount. DS school has just started selling drinks at lunchtime for 36p. It may be something happeneing in many schools.

My DS said something like that to me once (testing the water as friends DD's get to call her all sorts without any repremand). He simply lost everything and had to earn it back.

I did talk to him about it wasn't just a punishment but I think sometimes DC's say things without the feeling involved iyswim? So he won't actually do it and doesn't really mean it but wants to test your reaction to it.

What happened when you asked him about it?

Soccermom2 · 25/01/2012 20:34

Would he be forwarding on a text he got from someone else? Its weird he first asked for 40p then the text said 20p. also you say he is not normally cheeky and its not like it was just a slip of the tongue, it would have took him time to write text then send it, maybe HE is the one being bullied??

Hulababy · 25/01/2012 21:32

Did you get to the bottom of it?

elvisaintdead · 26/01/2012 09:34

wonder what happened...

PinotMN · 26/01/2012 09:37

Was this a wind up then?

Clawdy · 26/01/2012 20:05

Looks like it.....

Orchiddroop · 26/01/2012 20:08

No, surely not, maybe she just hasn't got back yet.....

PosieParker · 26/01/2012 20:21

smoggii · 27/01/2012 19:47

ohhh, i wanted to know what happened.

kreecherlivesupstairs · 28/01/2012 08:04

Her DS is holding her to ransom for 30p and no one will pay. I will Wheelyson if you PM me your bank details.
I want to know what prompted this.
Apologies for thinking 40p was a queer amount. DDs school doesn't sell stuff like that.

Ploink · 28/01/2012 08:15

Why do people assume a thread is a wind up just cos an OP isn't around all the time? She probably has a life and stuff

candr · 28/01/2012 18:34

How did your chat go?

bebanjo · 28/01/2012 21:05

Did he send the text?
did you ever find out?

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