Sleep, glorious sleep. (Please?)

[BabydollsMum]

Hi all

I'm new to the boards but wanting some advice please.

I was ill over Christmas and gave up breastfeeding my then 10 month old altogether due to being on all sorts of nasty drugs. This wasn't sudden at all. She was down to one feed last thing at night, and even then I doubt she was taking much milk, it was more of a comfort thing really. Anyway, I'm glad I've stopped and really proud of myself that I managed it for that long BUT now we have a little madam who absolutely refuses to go down at night and we're at our wits end and don't know what to do with her. At worst it's a two hour battle and we're all exhausted.

We do have a really good winding down routine of dinner, bath, story, bottle etc that we stick to, and sometimes it does work. Also, once she's down she's so exhausted that she generally sleeps through (small mercies!). I mentioned it to the HV, who really helpfully suggested a dummy?! How can you introduce a dummy at 11 months? Besides which I just know she wouldn't take it.

We have moved recently too so big changes - I know it's only been a month. She goes down for daytime naps no problem at all without me feeding her to sleep. She's eating well and taking lots of milk generally.

Any other ideas? I've never let her cry it out, and certainly don't think I could start now - we're also in a flat so I'm really aware of our neighbours upstairs doing their nuts as it is, so this really isn't an option.

Any advice greatly appreciated!

x

Hi there

Have you tried sitting in the room with her until she goes to sleep? This sometimes helps my dd when she is feeling unsettled/ unwell& sounds like she might be a bit unsettled due to your move, it's all new etc. maybe put her in her cot and then sit by the side/ in a chair so she can see you are still there but don't chat to her. You haven't sympathies though- this is a hard one

It is hard but I am afraid I would suggest at least trying a dummy and we did let DS cry it out after a 6 month regression of waking in the middle of the night. It took ten minutes the first night, 4 the next, one the next and that was it. We were kicking ourselves we hadn't done it earlier. We pre-warned our neighbours!

Definitely give the dummy a go at the very least. As you say she may not take and that's fine but if it helps her to go to sleep then why not? She's still little and needs to comfort. You may find that she'll use to go off to sleep and then spit it out like my one did. My one is now not bothered about having a dummy a bed time anymore, he's 20 mths. Good luck x

Thanks all. I'll give the dummy a go - it just felt to me like a bit of a backwards step as she's never had one before. I guess I was the dummy, hey? In terms of letting her cry it out, we're talking hours, not minutes and then I worry she'll get herself into such a tizz that she'll choke or something! She's such a good, chilled out baby in the day.

She is teething at the moment, so that may be part of the problem too. I hate to see her so distressed, it absolutely breaks my heart! :(

Will keep on - the battle of wits continues. Thanks again. xxx

Aw she's not being a little madam, she's probably in pain due to teething and confused due to the move :( I agree that leaving her to cry isn't a great idea when she seems to be needing a little more comfort at the moment. I hope she settles in soon :)

Update: So I tried the controlled crying thing - going in every 5-10 minutes etc but each time I went in to comfort her the screaming worsened, only to discover 20 minutes later that she had a huge wet poo in her nappy. Poor little love! Anyway, I think I may have a solution, which has worked for two nights in a row - fingers crossed for tonight! Once she's in her cot, that's it, she doesn't come out, but I do stay with her until she's asleep, in a chair next to the cot. When she stands up and screams I ignore her completely, but when she flops down and puts her head down, I comfort her and stroke her hair and rub her back until she gets the message that that's where she's got to stay. The first night this went on for about 45 minutes and was exhausting, but then last night only 10! Like I say, it's worked so far - and both nights she's slept through to 7.30. Please dear Lord let it work tonight.

xx