help help help I feel overwhelmed by 2 & 12 year old not so darling children!

[ohcluttergotme]

I have a 12 year old hormonal daughter and 2 year old tantruming son who definitely don't feel like my little darlings at the moment. (d)h is on nightshift so escapes every night & we're trying to put our house on the market. Seriously want to run away, would drown my sorrows in but know it'll only make sons tantrums feel a million times worse!

Ohclutter sounds like you are having a really rough tine at the moment. No real advice to offer- but it must be really difficult with DH working nights, and trying with trying to sell your house.
Do you have a strategy for your 2 year olds tantrums? Have just started putting DS2 in the corner when he tantrums, he is 18 months.

Thanks so not, think it just helps to put down how your feeling on this site & know you're not alone! Do sometimes use the naughty step for ds but have to say not always consistent with it which is prob part of the problem. My dd just breezed through the toddler stage with hardly a peep & was so nice natured so its a shock just how demanding & naughty my ds is & he can be so horrible to his big sister as he gets really jealous of her relationship with me or his Dad. This whole bringing up children is no easy task! Hope your getting on ok with your little darling

sorry to hear you're having a tough time at the moment. i have two suggestions. have you thought about introducing a reward system? do you think a simple sticker chart would work for your 2 year old, or is he too young? my son is 11 and i have just introduced pocket money BUT in order to get it he has to do one simple chore a day and not be rude (he has developed a bit of attitude recently!).

second suggestion - something needs to change so that you feel like you're having a break and not dealing with everything on your own. easier said than done i know! does your daughter go to bed well and at a reasonable time? i let my son read in bed for half an hour before lights out so that he winds down, but also it means then i get an hour or two to myself before i go to bed. also, lots of exercise to wear them out - maybe a walk or trip to the park after school / before dinner?

Thanks emm, think I'm going to try & be more consistent with the naughty step & try and introduce a reward chart. Not sure if he's too little but worth trying & he does love stickers. My dd always wants to sit with me up until her half 9 bedtime then I normally go to be too but think I'll try & say to her to go to her room so I can have an hour to myself. I work til half 4 so by the time I pick ds up & get home we're straight into teatime so not much time for walks. Don't mean to be negative & mb once the nights are getting lighter we could go for one after tea. I am feeling something needs to change & am thinking of a complete career change (re thread thinking of giving up nursing to childmind?) thanks for advice & good luck with reward chart for ds' attitude

Hi ohcluttergotme. I'm very excited to see someone else with children with the same age gap as mine. I have a tantrumming 2 year old girl and moody pubescent twin boys of 12 and I feel your pain! My daughter is a whirlwind of energy and constantly causing mayhem of one kind or another, aided by the fact that my partner and I are not very good at keeping our home organised and tidy. The boys take advantage of our constant distracted efforts to prevent her from destroying the place to spend all their time online or playing video games or going out with friends without telling us where they are or doing anything useful like taking their phones with them. So we look up from the overt noisy chaos of the girl to find that one boy has disappeared, the other has been playing skyrim for 4 hours straight, no one has done any homework or tidied their room, the house looks like a bomb has hit it and we feel too tired and drained to do anything about any of it. Arrrrrgh.

So no advice! But sympathy.

Oh scrummymummy your post made me smile whilst stuck in traffic driving home from work today
Your post could have been written by me, ds wrecks everywhere, he's called Dylan & our nickname for him is destruct-a-dyl! I can see my dd getting annoyed that all our time is taken up with ds & I feel so guilty all the time. My house too is complete chaos & my dh seems to think it will somehow magically be ready for viewing. The thought of getting it ready for viewing is making me feel ill & we have three cats one of whom has serious issues with realising he's a cat & not my son!
Thanks for sharing, not sure if it's wrong but does make me feel better to think we're not the only ones going through this! good luck with yours