Out of our comfort zone....

[lovemybabydoll]

Greetings from Mumbai...
I am a British Indian and so is my husband and children. My DD is 2.5 hrs and my DS is 4 mnths old. We have moved to Mumbai for my husband's business. My hubby and I have been in the UK since we were 8 years old. We have never lived elsewhere until recently I had to make a tough decision to move here. A lot of it was due to the fact that our business has not been doing as well, since the cutbacks, and we wanted to secure our children's future. So my hubby chose India to start his business which is to do very well but not for 2 years or so.
Now, the difficult bit for me is settling my kids here. Things are sloop different. Food, playing, the home, toilet, everything!!! Life is v stressful. Yup, you can get maids and drivers but the hassle to handle them... I feel that it would be better to do the work myself. But I cannot cos it's a whole different world. For eg, they don't use a mop to clean the floors, they use a cloth and they get down on their hands and knees!
So much more to say but anyone out there that had to move away with kids? Please reply with some tips and advice so that I dint feel this guilty for brining my kids into another world.
xoxo

Are you saying you can't get hold of things that you can in this country, ie: mops?

Can you import some stuff to make it easier for you or would it just be easier to hire help, as you described? If I could afford I'd choose the latter I think.

It must very hard adjusting to a completely contrasting way of life but you have lots of time. Don't think it'll all be easy from the start; you have two very small children so it's bound to take time.

Try to accomplish a little at a tiime - could you employ a nanny type person to help with the children for example?

I can't say I've lived anywhere like India but I was made to move to Germany (dh in forces) for a year whilst I had postnatal depression; it was extremely hard not to have the comforts of home and no family.

I hope you get someone to help you at home soon - I think it'll make a big difference.

I've done it in reverse. Left England for Oman, Thailand, Switzerland and then Belgium. We are back in England now.
How long have you been there for? I understand the initial bemusement of Mumbai, I visited it iyears ago when it was Bombay.
At my DDs last school there were several Indian women from Mumbai, all of them to a woman were lovely. Approachable and helpful and fun.
Do you have any playgroups there? If not, hopefully by the time your children start school (International or local) you'll have found a support network.

My family moved to Oman when I was 14. Is there an expat community you can get support from? It was common practice when I was there to have a house boy / girl and / or nanny if needed, it may help you to have someone to show you the ropes in the area, where to shop etc etc.

Is your DD going to go to any sort of nursery, that would be a good way to meet people.

It will take a while to settle in, that's only natural. Good luck!

You could try this website www.talkingcranes.com which is run by south east asian women all over the world and they have a talk board where someone might be able to help with advice.

Hi, I moved to Abu Dhabi with my 2.5 year old for a two year posting a few years ago and it is very difficult to adjust. It is really stressfull because EVERYTHING is different and it really does your head in. It was generally agreed among all the expats that it takes 6 months to settle in - and its true.
How long have you been there?

However, in the end I loved it and go back as often as I can. Try and hook up with any Brit expats because they will have been through this learning curve and can help you settle in enormously.

Hi

I am from Mumbai too but moved to the UK when I was 17. I do feel for you as inspite of maids and all the wealth in bbay I feel happier with the standard of living in the UK. However I could give you some survival tips for life in bbay, if you want to share some more.

As for the maids handling, do you have them full time or on shifts? Also if you are on good terms with neighbours / have other family around, get some recommendations from them as some of them are difficult to trust at times.

Food and amenities wise - If you visit South Bombay you will find a lot of western items there everything from Weetabix to Kettles to UK brand toiletries etc (they even have a Spar!)

Unfortunately the traffic and government policies and slow paperwork is something I can't solve and you have to swallow it like a bitter pill. But I can understand the differences, so if you ever need to moan or chat do get in touch. How long have you been there for now and is this a permanent move?

It's been awesome to receive your replies. It helped/s me a lot to communicate with people from home.
We came here mid November as this period is great weather wise. I thought it best time to settle the kids and they did settle very well after just a week. And we came with no certainty that we will move here, it was a research trip. Then my hubby did the research and was convinced that we settle here. He did suggest that we go home and then come back but I decided against that option. Reason being that I thought it unfair to carth them back in forth in terms of jet lag, weather, flight, climate...etc So I hope I made the right decision by just carrying on here... (confused)
We have a lovely modern new build flat in the Oberoi complex so it is as close as we can get to home until we drive out onto the main road. We are fortunate enough to live here as it does help a little in settling the kids. There's a park and pool so they don't need to go out.
Yes I have found a good nursery for my DD which leaves me time with my baby DS. DD likes the nursery but I have noticed a slight change in her behaviour pattern. She doesnt think twice to smack me now when she is upset or when I tell her off. Not all the time but more so since being here.
So my hubby is heading back home tomorrow to tie up some loose ends and pack our container with some important bits. I am going to miss him.
Anyway we pln to be here at least for a year and then review the situation.
I will def try that website out, thx.
I hear that getting a good maid in Mumbai is a task. I do have one now, she started yesterday and she was highly recommended. She will be staying with us so I have someone here when hubby is out.
Let's see....xoxo

Another funny observation made by me the other day - we went to a local fish Market and there were open tables with fresh fish being sold. I was utterly amused to find about 5-6 cats around the tables sitting so well behaved watching the fish. Can you believe that?
I bet they know that if they attempt to grab any of the merchandise, they will be beaten to death.
Soooooo funny. Some moments here are amazing and we love it but others make us miss home a lot!!
xxx