4 yr old who doesn't like to lose!

[OTTMummA]

DS is 4, and for christmas he got a load of board games and a few wii games, he is ok on the wii if he loses etc, but with the board games he very often gets upset, i mean really boo hooing about not having won.
I have told him that he can't win everytime, and that mummy, daddy don't get upset about losing when we've played, that its just for fun etc.
He has started to hit furniture and daddy now if he hasn't won at all, and i have told him we will not want to play with him any more if he continues hitting and being silly about not winning.
It hasn't resolved his behaviour completley, although he is a little better, but how else can i help him understand how to be a good loser?

I don't believe in letting children win, not at his age, i think losing is an important life lesson, any younger and i would probably be letting him win etc.
Or am i being to harsh?

No not too harsh at all! As long as he wins (or you let him win) some of the time!!!! He has to learn that we all can't win all of the time and his behaviour is not acceptable. I think that you should just stop playing the games for a while if the situation continues. At his age I think probably games need to be ones where everyone has the same chance of winning rather than games of strategy etc - until he overcomes some of his problems with losing anyway. Good luck!

Same here...although I'm 40 and don't like to lose either!!! We build it up slowly tbh as it is important to learn that you can't always win, but it doesn't have to be a hard stark lesson. DS wins a lot of the time, but loses occasionally (though not usually on first game), and everyone is 'oh never mind, I didn't win but I hope I do next time' and very gracious about it all, and then when he does lose straight in with the 'never mind, better luck next time..lets play again' etc etc..and it has worked brilliantly for all my kids so far. (obviouly these are short games, not trivial pursuit etc). Well done by the way on getting down to it and playing board games with a 4 year old..always a bit of a challenge! Cbeebies has a lazytown 'board game; where the computer controls it so there can be no cheating and no blame...thats a good one!!!

I think they are all like this? Mine went through a phase of being quite good at losing, but he's reverted.

I think games of chance are the best, and then you focus on it just being luck rather than the child thinking that they 'aren't good' at something.

mmm I think 4 is a bit to early for losing being an important life lesson

I would say, just choose games wisely - at 4 my eldest was banned from "shopping list" as she HAD to have a certain card.

Snakes and ladders is good for learning losing as ANYONE can slide down the snake or pip others to the post on the final ladder. But at 4 I was still letting mine win MOST of the time....

He got games like snakes and ladders, but always has to get a six and tries to drop the die onto a six, lol, it never works but he sure gets frustrated if anyone else gets a 6. We also play dominos, which I'm crap at, and lido, so not high skill games :).