Weaning off the TV,

[SillyOldBear01]

I'm well awaiting to be flamed,
But I have become one of those mothers who uses the TV as essentially as a minder whilst I need to get stuff done,
I know this needs to stop, I am trying to make stuff work without it now,
the problem is my 2 year ds (definetly in full swing of terrible 2's) is very,very hyperactive. the size of a 4 year old and never sits still, literally never.. He doesnt eat particularly, doesn't sleep in the afternoon unless we are out in the pram which is no use to me if i'm tired lol, takes a long time for him to sleep at night , usualy wakes up around 3ish comes in with us but we are basically hanging so no sleep and I find it hard enough to function with on average 3/4 hrs sleep without mr bouncing off the walls.
Sometimes he goes through phases of hes okay as long as I'm sat in the same room but as soon as I stand up he screams and wants to be held, he's very heavy and I have a wholev house to run myself, in these weeks its hard to get basic things done.

How do I keep him entertained and then be able to go and do chores with no distractions???

help please?

Ok, we don't have a TV and have 2 year old twin boys.

Great things so you can get stuff done -
highchair and playdoh with a storytape playing
colouring / sticking/ anything a bit messy
'helping' you with the housework (give him a duster and some spray - water in a spray bottle and get him cleaning windows)
some flour and water in a bowl with a wooden spoon
Go out and collect some 'stuff' and give him glue and paper to stick it on

and lots and lots of exercise and fresh air. Think of him as needing what a dog needs - fresh air, routine and sleep.

And a bit of TV is fine - don't beat yourself up over it!

Cool , we dont currently have a highchair anymore I've considered using his lil wooden chair and attaching reins lol

A little Tv is okay but I have become too reliant.

Definitely go cold turkey. We don't have tv at all, though DD (2.8) is allowed to watch some of a DVD at weekends (usually half an hour to an hour). You may well find that his sleep improves - he sounds like he might be overstimulated by it. His concentration span and ability to amuse himself might well improve too, though you could be in for a couple of bad weeks as you wean him off it. I agree with eggtimer too - lots of fresh air. A warm rainsuit and wellies are invaluable at this time of year. Good luck - less tv is definitely a move in the right direction!

He was like that before Octavia, but it may be adding to it, I agree.

what about music cds that he could dance too ? along the same lines as a story tape, i.e., something he could listen to rather than be mesmerised by moving colours (I know, I have a 2.2 year old!), there are kids CDs out there that he could dance to or learn words to, or anything catchy really. Mine will dance to almost anything and goes really calm to classical music. mine can also crayon for about 30mins studiously which is good; mostly mine likes to run about and doesn't sleep in the day, has boundless energy, so I agree with the fresh air/wear them out theory as well (we have a lot of runs in parks!), we are lucky in that he sleeps all through the night but he won't sleep during the day apart from about twice a week in his buggy. I don't think theres anything wrong with a little telly, I certainly hoover/wash up/make dinner in a hurry to the tunes of Waybaloo as I know he won't be doing anything naughty, in fact he does all their yoga moves which is good!!! but I turn it back off then... we played Elefun yesterday for an hour, which is good considering all he wants to do is put the 'flowers' back in the trunk! :)

I used to get DS to 'help' with a duster, loading the washing machine, playing with pegs, etc. whatever you want to do, just let it take twice as long but make it a game so you are playing.

Also have your shower at night, when they are in bed.

Thanks for all your advice,

I havent gone cold turkey, but first thing this morning he spent reading a mag and actually ate his cereal,
and this afternoon he was certainly bouncing off the walls but I did mamage to get underwear done at least lol not much I know.
I will try less tommorrow,
the people who don't have tv's? do you not have it at all even in the evening??

I love TV - otherwise I would have a dirty house and no clean clothes! I just make sure that the TV show is gentle and boring, Night Garden, Peppa, Teletubbies or similar. DH has put Disney or Nickleodeon on a couple of times and DS was like a deer in the headlights - too much colour, sounds and action. Never again! Sometimes DS finds jobs and helping fascinating and thats nice or he might read or play by himself but when he is just milling around unsettled then TV is like magic.

I also make sure that the TV isn't just on in the background bleating out adverts and news shows etc. I don't have TV for a half hour / 1 hour before I want DS to nap or have night time sleep. DH used to grumble about this but if TV is just randomly playing I see a big difference in behaviour and readiness to sleep.

FWIW my most anti-tv friend has sticky floors and a permanent sinkful of pots. I bet thats not true of all anti-tv mums but its what I think about when she tries to get all moral about TV :)

I wish I could stick him in his cot or lay him on the sofa with a blanket for a nap, but he just won't :(

We don't have have a Tv, a sink full of dirty pans or sticky floor... I do have a 3 years old and an almost 2 years old.
I have my shower in the morning and they either play in the bathroom or next door in their bedroom.
When I cook we talk about what I am cooking or I give them carrots batons or frozen strawberries and they go away munching and playing. We have an open plan kitchen/living so that might help. They also help me prepare food or just watch with interest.

I can't really explain what I'm doing to deal with them when I'm cleaning/doing the laundry because they have never bothered me to the point where I couldn't do a chore. Earlier ds1 emptied the washing machine in a basket while I was picking up dirty clothes in the bedrooms. Then he went off to play. They just come and go. What I mean is that maybe whilst your weaning it is going to be difficult, your ds will be moaning and whingeing but you will both get used to the new routine and things will just get better. You will know when is the best time to clean and he will know when you can't play.

Ps: we do watch the news of the computer or some DVDs when the children are in bed. And we have an iPad and the kids watch selected cartoons once in a blue moon or when making long car journeys (holidays).

I have a 5yr old DS and a 3yr old DD and telly is limited. When they were both at home DS tended to watch some after lunch while I settled DD down for her nap. Now DS is at school he watches about 45 mins after we get back from school.

I found that once we had a set time for it, there was less nagging to have it on (DS does try it on every so often tho...) And once we've broken through the 'I boooored' conversation, they often find something to occupy themselves. Tonight it was rolling matchbox cars down a length of plastic pipe.

I have playdough in the kitchen which DD often plays with while I cook/clean. She also likes to sit on the 'mountaintop' (the worktop) and chat while I prepare food.

My three dc don't watch tv - we made a decision not to watch any until they were three, but once one got to three the younger ones were around, so it was easier just to have a blanket rule of 'no tv'. Loads of friends were sceptical about it, and worried that they would get picked on at school for not knowing characters from shows etc, but I can report that they are absolutely fine. Dd (now 5) knows e.g. Peppa Pig etc from reading books. My ds is 2, and sounds a bit like your hyperactive son, but he plays with his toys, plays with his sister when he is in the mood, 'helps' me, and when we can we do things together. My other dd is 1, and it can be a handful trying to get things done with two tinies and a school-age child to get ready for the school run. Music and stories, lots of reading, and basic things like dressing up clothes (hats - my youngest loves hats!). I know tv isn't this evil thing that will harm the children irreversibly, and I know that watching tv together can be lovely and educational, but so can other things, so we just don't do it. As for in the evening, over the last few years we've watched less and less tv ourselves. I perhaps watch an hour a week now. We occasionally watch a DVD, but cancelled our LoveFilm subscription because when dd was born it took us 8 months to watch the film they sent us! Floors aren't sticky, and no pile of pans, but we don't have a dishwasher, and I do have to work hard to keep on top of things. I'd go cold turkey, and see what happens!!

We don't have TV at all - even in the evenings. We do watch films, and we've both got hobbies so frequently we'll be doing those.

For the record I also don't have piles of pans and sticky floors!

How about making it a rule always to get out of the house first thing in the morning. Have DS walk (which means you prob can't go very far, obviously). Is there a playground or park within walking distance? An hour of fresh air and running around (whatever the weather - a pair of waterproofs means kids don't care about rain) will really take the fidgets out of him. Two hours, and he might even want that nap later! Two DSs and a baby DD here, and I have to take them out every morning if I want (relatively) calm small people in the afternoon...

p.s. meant to say no TV here either

first, don't beat yourself up about it too much. of course none of us want our children to be watching tv for hours on end but half and hour if it means you can get a few jobs done is not the end of the world. and it sounds as if your ds is not a sedentary type anyway.

we don't actually have tv but we watch it ondemand via the computer, and also get lots of dvds out from the library. i find it's a good balance because it means i can control what ds is watching - like AV, i stick to fairly boring programmes like peppa pig, hairy mcclary etc and DS is usually bored stiff after about half an hour! the only time he sits still to watch for longer is if he is sick or very tired. perhaps your TV could 'break down' for a few weeks, to give you a chance to move over the dvds/on demand?

if your ds has trouble settling, it's worth cutting out tv in the hour before bedtime as it is believed to be a stimulant.

This thread has inspired me to kick the tv habit- OP you are not alone in using it as a babysitter to get jobs done!
We r 3 days in & I gave in this evening for 30 mins whilst I put DS2 (7mths) to bed as we got home late & everything was out of synch, but otherwise it's been turned off. DS1's (2.10) behaviour has been dramatically changed by no telly & I'm def going to keep it up. He's another bull in china shop & I just got sick of defiance, tantrums, hyperactivity so decided to cut it out to see if things improved. Hes such a lovely little chap but I think 3odd hrs of telly a day (split over 8-10am & 4-6pm periods)was really doing him no favours at all. Anyway no judgeypants here but the experiment does seem to point in direction of less tv= calmer & happier child. He's also playing lots more with all the numerous & expensive toys which normally get ignored! Hurrah.

Just marking my place for when DD is older. I'd dearly love a no tv rule but my DP likes to have it on, the annoying thing is that it's often just rubbish shows providing background noise

Got to get out of the habit of sticking a dvd on at DS's request. He's a similar age to your DS, OP. It's his habit & mine...we both have to break it.