ds (4) & dd (6) interested in each others "bits" advice please

[Shhhh]

This thread is genuine and tbh im a bit about starting it as I have no idea how it started and how to end it.

Ds is 4 and dd is 6, brother and sister. Dh & I aren't prudes yet I guess we don't flaunt things iykiwm. I would say we don't make a big deal about things when we are dressing/undressing.

The kids are aware that mummy has different body parts to daddy and that they are the same.

ds is a little obsessed with my boooobbbs but hey ho guess thats life.

Thing that worries me is ds & ds's obsession with each others bits. We do still bath/shower them together and they do on occasion have "sleepovers" (they both sleep in one bed on ocassion although do have seperate rooms). We felt that allowing a sleepover was a fun thing and exciting to do at weekends for example.

Now, the last month or so dd comes down to us during the sleepover (usually about 10-60 mins after going to bed/ After they have screamed/laughed/fought etc) and moans she can't sleep etc and says ds is tickling her bits.

We tell her either ignore him and on occasion we have stopped the sleep over. Now today I overheard dd telling ds to tickle her bits. .

WTF do I do now..???

I am pretty sure its just kids messing about and I guess they are more aware they are different but how do I handle this..?

I have an idea with when the il's babysat for us last week that they both had stripped their pj's off (normal behaviour as they get hot in bed) and the il's stopped the "sleepover"... im not sure if more happened iykwim and dd/ds complained.

Im stressing as I don't want my il's to think more of it iykwim.

HELP!

I think the curiosity is natural, and of course you don't want DC to think of their bodies as being in any way dirty or shameful.

But I think you definitely need to instil the sense that some areas of the body are not for touching by other people. That its ok to touch a hand or and arm, or kiss someone's cheek, but that other areas are private which is why we tend to keep them covered in our society. It's about helping them to understand the normal boundaries. But go gently, don't make a big deal of it, just make it clear that's not what we do.

Btw I have no helpful experience of this as DS is much younger, but it's how I think I would approach.

I have a 6yo DS and 4yo DD. They are very interested in each other's bums, willies etc and I am very relaxed about this as it seems a natural stage. However it's mainly looking rather than touching - I must admit that I would be a little disconcerted if DS was "tickling DD's bits"!

I think maybe no more sleepovers. Don't say why, just say "own beds tonight" until they stop asking.

Sounds pretty normal and nothing to worry about. I remember doing the 'you show me yours and i'll show you mine' thing out of curiosity with a male friend when i was probably about 6. There was nothing in it other than curiosity that we were 'different'.

However, yours are old enough now to understand that their bits are theirs and nobody else's to touch. Just gently guide them onto the right path without making too much of a big deal out of it, the same way you'd stop them touching their own bits in public.

Oh, and also watching the thread with interest - there are 17 months between my DS and niece who see a lot of each other and i anticipate having to deal with this at some stage!