Will using a sling to control colic cause problems withputting DD down on her own later on?

[SweetLikeChocolate]

My 4 week old DD has developed colic and the best way of managing it for her seems to be carrying her in the Moby sling. It seems to work best if i carry her in this way for most of the day (not just for the period of crying-i have no idea why) but now I am concerned that this will lead to her being hard to put down once the colic is over. Any one have experience in this area?

Hi

My personal view is that it won't cause problems for your child and whether it does for you will depend on your expectations, if you see what I mean?

I carried DS2 a lot in a sling all his naps until 4 months old, I have DS1 who has a disability and it was easier that way. I also carried him when I cleaned, I work from home running four holiday cottages so I do A LOT of cleaning!

DS2 is now 14 months and is very affectionate but also quite independent. He walked and 10 months and is now at the stage where he never stops moving. He still likes lots of cuddles, he can self settle at night but sometimes won't.

My feeling is lots of carrying = secure baby, baby gets lots of input from being up at your level and experiencing all the things your doing. I think human babies are probably biologically designed to be carried for many months but I'm sure many others will disagree with me!

Whatever you choose to do if it helps you get through day happier, with less crying, keeping doing it. If it works for you both it can't be wrong. You'll know when it's time to stop.

Keep carrying her. That's the best. In Africa they carry babies for up to a year. We are quite strange putting them down so early, it's so much more comforting for them to be held and no it won't affect later, well only in making her more confident .

I was worried about this too as my baby would only nap in the carrier in the daytime for the first three months. I regularly tried to get him to nap in a moses basket/cot/buggy but we both just got stressed so I decided just to go with it and thought that I would change things when it became physically uncomfortable. At three months I just decided I didn't want to be doing it all the time and at that stage he seemed much more open to cot napping. After few weeks of gentle practice he got used to the cot and now at six months he can nap anywhere but we still often use the carrier when out and about and he sleeps well in it. I think they are brilliant and would definitely use one for future babies without worrying about it.

Thank you all so much for your input. I am new to Mumsnet and was thrilled to wake up this morning to all your responses. I am not alone!!!!
We had another colic episode yesterday eve/night and even the sling didnt work magic... I get really upset to hear her cry at all. After some time being held by daddy to give me a break, DD did settle next to me in bed and we co-slept which resulted in a good night sleep for her and not too bad for me. However today she is feeding like crazy-every 2 hours. I just dont seem to be able to follow any of the books which tell you to put your baby down or structure feeds as any routine seems to involve not giving her what she wants when she asks for it and then of course she cries which is not ok with me. I have 2 older ones but I had a maternity nurse with them so this is my first to figure out alone. I seem to swing from confident to stress mess in minutes.

i was baby led with ds1 and life was very easy and laid back - he would sleep anywhere whenever he needed but did develop self settling problems which peaked at 7months and i couldn't cope. it wasn't the sling but all the co-sleeping and feeding to sleep.

ds3 is a very similar baby and i did gf from day 1 with him. it took several weeks for him to start settling into a routine (my older 2 did on their own around 10weeks) and i couldn't follow the feed times much as i was ebf. i had several slap the face moments where i realised the blasted gf book was messing things up and my baby was screaming to be fed, not for sleep. don't forget about all the growth spurts.
i also carried ds3 a lot in the sling (i miss my newborn moby carries!) but when it was 'nap time' i always put him in the moses basket in a dark room (when we were home) so he has never had self settling issues. best thing i did when i think of the hours i spent trying to get my older 2 to sleep.

it depends what you want to be doing in a couple of months imo. i knew i couldn't cope without a very structured routine with 3 under 3 but with my 2nd i was very baby led and focused on my older child - baby just fitted in. most of the time i had no idea when he was due a feed or sleep and that worked perfectly for us because he fitted into his big brother's routine after a few months, who was only 15months older.

when even the sling didn't work i used to walk up and down the stairs, quite heavily!
do you know about the 5s's? there's a video on youtube somewhere, am racking my brain. baby is pretty much guaranteed to settle (if not hungry) with swaddling, swaying, shushing (quite loud and long shushes, think womb noise), sucking (dummy), laying on it's side.

No.

But how do you know when it is nap time? We dont have a routine and she falls asleep at the breast (after eating a fair amount as she is gaining well). She is nearly 5 weeks now but was born at 37 weeks so perhaps she needs more sleep than most. She gets over stimulated if kept up too long- (more than an hour) which worsens her colic.

I went with the baby led way too. At the beginning it is hard to know if they are hungry or tired but gradually a regular spacing of feeds and naps just seems to
Happen, and that way it suits your baby and there's less battles. That's until growth spurts, development spurts or illness disrupt everything and you have to settle into a new pattern all over again!

When you've had help in the past it's difficult to trust your instincts, my DS1 was in hospital at 5 days old and I found it very hard to adjust when we left because of all the support I'd had. It sounds to me though that you're very in touch with your little one, you just need to trust your instincts and keep going what works for you both, a pattern that suits you both will develop with time.

I would suggest you put the "routine" type books away for the next few months at least, and try not to think about what you "ought" to be doing when. These books just don't work for every baby (particularly not when there may be underlying reasons for baby's behaviour, reflux for example) and are more likely to cause stress imho. Colicky crying is so hard to cope with, I feel your pain! Have you come across Dr Sears' concept of a "high need" baby? ( I don't know how to make a link, but look up the website Ask Dr Sears) If you have one of these, join the club and please don't worry about things like feeding to sleep, co-sleeping or constant carrying- there are many of us who would have gone insane without these essential parenting tools!

Sorry, posted too soon- meant to add that 4 weeks is still so early- as time goes on your baby's natural rhythm of sleeping and feeding will become clearer. I would just follow her cues till then, and then once you've got a basic framework to start from you can work it into a routine if that's what suits you. Hope that helps a bit at least, and hope the colic isn't too unbearable this evening!

stay baby led for a few more weeks to give things a chance to settle down. make sure she doesn't stay awake longer than 2hrs but some babies only go 1 1/2hrs (think it's the baby whisperer, i had 2hr babies so it didn't work for us at all). they need to be quiet and settled around 10mins before though.

Thank you so much Ladies. I do believe a large part of this is confidence. Nothing feels too bad if you believe you are doing the right thing and this is all just a moment in time. Easy to pontificate on a night when DD not crying!