arghhhhhh at my mother!!!

[JackJacksmummy]

Ok, so my 5.5yr old son has issues - we don't know what yet, he hasn't been assessed but is on the SENco's "radar" so to speak.

He is a very active, boisterous, loud boy, he has been since the moment he could crawl. He has obsessive issues where everything has to be straight and the right way round, he rarely makes eye contact with you unless its on his terms, he has minor speech pronounciation problems and is also extremely clumsy. He is also very sweet, loving, kind and polite when he wants to be.

My mothers answer today when he was jumping in his bedroom was to say to me "give him a smack, he won't do it again, it never hurt you three"
Now I know giving him a smack definitely will not teach him to not to do it again, he would because thats the way he is.

I have 3 children, my 2 oldest are calm, placid children who are the exact opposite of Jack but all loved equally and they have also never been smacked or "hit"

Why is it EVER ok to hit children??!!! and why do people of the older generation say "it never hurt anybody".....

Grrrrrrr - sorry just had to moan somewhere!!!

Anybody who claims that they weren't harmed by a smack, so you should go ahead and smack another person is clearly missing an important point of fact. They have been harmed by having been smacked - they now think it's okay to inflict violence on a vulnerable child.

I'm sorry your mum isn't being supportive, and I hope you get some answers that help with regard to your son.

It is never OK to smack, it's like saying " if you do something I don't like I am going to hurt you "

exactly! What he needs is understanding and guidance not a threat of a wallop because he's just being a boy - albeit with some difficulties!

She doesn't know how to communicate with him and obviously thinks thats the way to get through to him whereas DP and I have learnt over time how he works and how to talk him round... MOST of the time!

I was beaten up every day by a mother who was convinced I was purposely annoying her. I was a mousy quiet kid who was desperate to do the right thing but my mother never saw that. Smacking does a lot of damage.

smacking is for people who are too stupid to find a way to communicate with a child.

it is illegal to smack another adult - for a good reason too - i therefore cannot understand why people think it acceptable to smack a child.

smile sweetly and ignore your mother or just say "awww bless you and your old fashioned ways". but always smile sweetly!

Bla! She's not the only dinosaur mother out there. I would take a deep breath and say something like "we have chosen not to smack our children, the research nowadays (get out for her) shows that it is detrimental to their well being and there are much better ways of disciplining. (also lots of 5 year olds jump in their rooms, it's really not that bad...........whispered under your breath).