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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

4 m/o - is this normal?

18 replies

Annie456 · 28/12/2011 22:24

Evening all,
I have a 15 wk old, bf, 17lb DS who can't seem to sleep for more than 3 hours at a time at night. He goes down at 7.30pm and often needs help settling as he goes through sleep cycles every 40 mins.

I feed him at about 11 as he usually wakes up when we go to bed, then he wakes for food again at 2 and 5 and is up and awake at 7. Are the 2 and 5am feeds normal? Isn't he big enough to technically go from 11-7? I usually try to soothe him in his cot, or pick him up to settle/burp him or last resort give him a dummy but usually end up having to feed him back to sleep.

Also, is it normal / ok to breastfeed immediately before putting him down to sleep? He always falls asleep whilst feeding and if I try to feed earlier (before his bath) then I can't get him off to sleep at 7...how bad is it to have to bf to sleep??

Finally, he has a 30 min nap every 2 hours during the day. My book suggests I should be aiming for a 2 hour nap midday...but I can't get him to go more than 30 mins.

Just trying to work out what's normal and how to solve the night time issues...
Thanks

OP posts:

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SilveryMoon · 28/12/2011 22:36

All sounds pretty normal to me.
Books are great to get ideas from and merge ideas to make your own way, but are no means instruction manuals.
Your ds is still very young, I'd say just follow his lead, they are all different and need different things.
My 2 dsks were complete opposites. 1 would have big feeds every 4 hours and have nice long naps, where the other one fed little and often and cat-napped all day.
Maybe keep a diary of what he wants and you might eeven notice a routine developing all on it's own.
Try not to worry, just go with it, and don't take on battles you won't win (like night feeds), not worth it.
Good luck.

ShowOfHands · 28/12/2011 22:40

Size is irrelevant. Some babies sleep through, some don't. A couple or three feeds a night at 4mo is completely normal.

DD v rarely slept during the day and never for more than 30 minutes.

DS is only ever awake for 90 minutes (he's 16wo) and then sleeps for about 50 minutes. He does this throughout the day.

They're all different and sleep differently.

Feeding to sleep is normal too. Imagine if they didn't feed to sleep. You'd have to find Other Methods.

It all passes in the end.

mrsalwaysawake · 28/12/2011 22:44

Sounds just the same as my son. I wouldn't worry at all. If he wants feeding, feed him.

I wrote a longer reply but the internet ate it.

mrspepperpotty · 28/12/2011 22:52

There is a difference between 'normal' and 'average'.

It's probably true that on average you would expect a 15 week baby to sleep a bit longer than 3 hours at a stretch at night and 30 mins in the day, but many don't. Your DS sounds completely normal in the sense that it doesn't sound like there is anything wrong with him.

I seem to remember my babies sleeping for about 45 mins at a time during the day, until they 'learnt' to put 2 sleep cycles together and sleep for 1.5 hours. I think that was around 6 months. But IME a big lunchtime nap of over 2 hours is more likely in an older baby of over a year (ie when they have dropped their other naps and are down to one nap a day).

Breastfeeding to sleep is also very normal at this age. The worry is that at some point you will have to wean him off it, but if I were you I would go with whatever works for the moment and gives you the maximum amount of sleep, and worry about that in a few months' time!

lollystix · 28/12/2011 23:14

Sounds like ds2 who was bf too. Not to concern you but he was still carrying on waking several times a night at 2 (17 times one night). We took him to cranio sacral therapist and it worked wonders - just wish I'd done it sooner.

Original poster

Annie456 · 29/12/2011 17:39

Thanks all. I guess I'll just have to see what happens for a few days and chart his feeds and sleeps. I think I'll try to express bottles for the evening so I can be sure how much he's taken. I suspect he has reflux too so I'll try some baby gaviscon and see if there's any improvement...

I read somewhere that they hit their growth spurts early / late depending on whether they were born early / late and as he was born at 42 weeks it would make sense that it's the 4 month sleep regression....

OP posts:

Santageekmum · 30/12/2011 10:35

Thanks for posting this Annie. We're going through the same issue with my ds who is 16 weeks. The irritating thing is that at one point he was sleeping from 8:30 to 6am!

He has started napping better in the day though - so much so I'm tempted to start waking him! I guess this sleep issue will pass eventually but I'm going to be crappy with sleep deprivation in the meantime

CurlyJims · 30/12/2011 14:55

my dc3 fed every two hours until he was weaned at 8 months! So every 3 hours doesn't seem that bad!!

CurlyJims · 30/12/2011 14:57

Annie whats the 4 month sleep regression? I have a 10wk old will their sleeping get worse/better around 4 months?!

ShowOfHands · 30/12/2011 17:27

Worse

Not noticeable in all babies tbh but a 4 month old baby v often regresses to newborn type sleep and moods. It's developmental. See here.

winnybella · 30/12/2011 17:37

Yes, worse . Probably.

OP, it all sounds totally normal to me. IIRC, at that age DD was BF to sleep at around 8, would wake up any time between 11 and 12.30 and then one or two more times before morning. Hmm, actually we co-slept, so I just gave you her schedule from 6 months on...at 4 months she would definitely not go longer than 3 hours without a feed.

mrspepperpotty · 30/12/2011 18:01

My breastfed DD was sleeping through from 7am to 7pm by 3 months. At 6 months she was waking for a feed every 4 hours! That was still loads better than my 2 DSs though!

beela · 30/12/2011 20:27

Sounds totally normal to me, and a 2 hour nap at midday for a 4 mo?? We've only just got to that stage at 14 months!

Go with the baby, not the book

CurlyJims · 31/12/2011 21:23

Thanks show off hands I didn't know anything about this :( my lo is 10 weeks so I have more sleepless nights to look forward to :(

suebabyplay · 01/01/2012 23:35

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by Mumsnet.

Original poster

Annie456 · 02/01/2012 22:08

Well the gaviscon didn't have any effect but interestingly, when I tried to express for his evening feed at the time I would feed him before bed (I had sore nips so wanted to give bottle) I only managed 3oz total from both sides-he usually falls asleep after one side so maybe he was only getting an ounce or so at that feed? Now I express and make sure he has at least 5oz at 7pm and as a dream feed at 11 and he's gone through til 5am! Maybe he was hungry?!!

OP posts:

Sparklyboots · 02/01/2012 23:15

OP, you may not be able to express the amount he can access; expressing isn't a reliable way of keeping track. I did find it useful in early days to help establish my milk supply as DS was a bit hit-and-miss with the latch and by early evening would be very hungry and tired. Honestly, though, everything sorted itself out and I just dropped the expressing (about 4 months), along with trying to manipulate or create routines and sleeping/eating schedules. I'd really recommend not worrying, and try leaving it just settle itself. Whatever schedule you 'achieve' is going to be disturbed with teeth, colds, developmental leaps, growth spurts, differences between babies, etc. A two hour, mid day sleep sounds way out of what my healthy, well-rested, well-fed, developing normally Ds could do at that age - even now, though we are transitioning to just one nap a day, an hour and a half is good going for us.

BigBabyBoots · 04/01/2012 03:24

My ds is 16 weeks and 3 weeks ago he started sleeping through the night, from 8pm-8am (with a feed at 2am) - heaven! But last weekend he began waking 4 hourly again, and since Friday he's back to waking every 2 hours, ugh. He's also feeding a helluva lot so I've put it down to a growth spurt and crossing fingers it doesn't last too long (please don't be sleep regression!).

In the day time he's up for 90 mins, then naps for 50, all day.

Bum, I can't scroll back up on my phone but is the general method of dealing with sleep regression to 'wait it out'? So tired :(

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