I have two ds. Ds1 is 5.6 and generally good, but I find I am so easily angry with him, where as ds2 can rarely get to me, even if he's trying to bite/scratch me whilst i'm cooking dinner! Is this just a first child thing, or am I just horrible?
For example I was in the middle of cooking dinner when ds2 starting tantrumming and crying over something. I was just trying to get on with cooking and ignore the tantrum, but ds1 as usual was trying to make it worse by goading him, calling him silly, laughing etc. He then proceded to write a note to ds2 calling him a silly poo. Obviously, ds2 being only 3 couldn't read this, so it was me being affected. Now, looking back I should have taken this lightly, he's just bored and trying to entertain himself, but I find myself feeling like he is the worst child in the world and manhandling him out of temper. I don't know how to stay calm with this stuff. Ds2 was in the kitchen with me so wasn't noticing what ds1 was doing, so I should be able to ignore it, shouldn't I? but instead, I explode.
I feel so guilty as I just find ds1 such hard work, whereas ds2 just makes me happy. Ds1 isn't a bad boy, hard work and demanding in some ways, but just average, whereas generally ds2 is just so easy so therefore I enjoy him more.
Anyone else feel like this?