HELP! any one got ideas on a very clingy whinging 2 1/2 yrs old

[emanspiks]

hi to you all i am new to this so bear with me!! my daugter is 2 1/2 yrs and she is starting to drive me insane. She whinges most of the time always says "my mammy" to people, friends, kids in nursery and even when there is no one around.
she does go to nursery 3 times a week for 2 1/2 hrs
she is happy when i am sitting down with her but if i try to cook clean or potch around the house most of the time she has tantrums and whinges she hardly ever shares with her 3 1/2yr brother and she's becoming to be a `ickle witch lol.

anyway she's the most beautiful thing to see and i adore her but i feel after being off anti-depressants for 11mths i will be back down the road again if i dont try and sort this out

if there is anyone out there with help or advise please send it on

oh yeah she has plenty of toys to play with and she loves watching dvd's so its not that she's bored it may be sometimes but not all!!

thanks ever sooo much

Hi EmaN,

My DD is very much the same as yours - she thrives on constant attention and the only way I get get time to do something is to put on a DVD for her.

I just thought I'd post so you'd know that you're not alone and see what else other people have to suggest.

hi there veuveclicquot

thanks very much for your remarks

im glad there is someone else out there with similar problems - i have so much to say on my dd but i dont want to bore anyone lol anyway i really hope my dd and yours will out grow this very soon but thanks for getting in touch xx

Hi, I've got DD whose 2.9 months, she went through a very clingy stage about 1-2 months ago, always wanting to be cuddled and carried. It was so hard to say no. In the end I had to tell her that I couldn't do this all the time and that mummy had to get on with other things. I think its a phase they must go through. I remember it was very hard though. In the end, I involved her in the daily chores I was doing and made it sound fun (sounding so stupid at the same time). She enjoyed it (still does) and it made me feel better that I was involving her and giving her the attention she was craving. It also made it easier to say no to the constant attention seeking. She still does it, especially if she doesn't get her own way for something, but I try and change the subject. After a bit of thinking I realised that I was expecting her to get on and live her little life in this house and occupy her own mind with tv, toys etc., once I'd realised this was totally unrealistic, my attitude changed and so did hers.

I find very open ended toys, such as household objects work best with this age group, rather than plastic electronic sort of toys - things like a collection of ribbons to sort through, some shells and a few boxes with lids, a few corks and a cardboard tube to post them into, etc etc. You might find you get 10 mins to yourself by introducing this sort of playtime.

Other than that ds (2.9) always wants to be doing what I am doing so I give him a cloth and empty bottle of soap when I am doing the bathroom, a bowl with a few oats in when I am cooking and so on. Well, that's what I aim to do anyway, what I usually do is moan "Can't you leave me alone for 5 minutes, you've got a house full of toys blah blah blah blah"

I agree expecting them to get on with their own stuff at this age is unrealistic unless you have a very independent and resourceful child. Bless her for wanting to be with you so much, it's a compliment to you that she does

With my dd, it is more than a phase, it is part of what she is. I do any chores around her needs, rather than the other way round. For example, if she wants to play in the living room, I do my living room chores. If she is happy to be in the kitchen, I do my kitchen chores whilst amusing her. Of course, I can try to engineer her to be in the room I want to be, to some extent.

Perhaps not the answer you wanted to hear!

My dd (3 last week) is exactly the same ...and always has been...it's not a passing phase for her.
My son would always play independently ...and was a great toy fan. dd is a people person...she follows me around the house...doing what i'm doing...chatting ten to the dozen.She likes art and craft and a bit of role play/dressing up...and a few dolls/bears...but nothing else much.

Sometimes it drives me mad ! I am really feeling it this week at ds and dh are back at school/work.

I was exactly the same ...and i was probably the most independent of all of my siblings as we got older...so i keep trying to remember that she won't be mommies shadow forever...but sometimes the days are so looooooonnnnng iykwim!

Sorry...no magic cures here.....I just have to work with it...giving her jobs... and involving her in just about everything.

hi thanks for the great replies - its really nice to know im not the only one out there

your comments have all gone down a treat and are very helpfull

FrannyandZooey yes the way she is loving to me is the best feeling in the world (well most of the time lol) and i do love the attention form her ( when she does it to dh he loves it too but its me most of this time)

i just thought i was doing something wrong but know i feel that i might have a little bit more control over the attention seeking

well all i can do is try!!!

but excellent sugestions and thanks keep them coming

my little one is just the same he is 20months and has always been very clingy. He wants to be everywhere i am. What i have to do is like others
have already suggested and involve him in what ever i am doing...washing up, cleaning. cooking, brushing my teeth. I was hoping it would get better as he gets older but i`m not sure that will happen.

Same here! I'm exhuasted! C1 - 18 mths has the same problem . His like super gule, can't be separted at all. When I stand up and want to some chores he would be like a kola bear sticking on to his mommy. It really tires me. I need some advise too on how or what I can do to help him and my self. Any one ????