My 10 yo has no friends

[Finka1]

Hi, I'm new to mumsnet, but have run out of ideas to help my DS cope with the fact that he has no real friends at school. He has some minor special needs (speech and language and social communication difficulties), and lives quite often in a world of his own. He has had some friendships but they disintigrate and usually end up in him being left out and his "friends" bully him. He now has a reputation in the school for having no friends and told me that even children in lower years laugh at him for it. I have talked to the school who have been largely unhelpful, (head master actually said he could address the bullying as he hadn't witnessed it and it was therefore here say). He is a lovely, gentle child, but truthfully, not great at sports and most after school activities don't really appeal to him. I have run out of ideas!

My main problem is his birthday is looming. He's just watched his little brothers party and i would like to make him feel as good. Any suggestions that don't involve standing in the sleet in January would be really appreciated!

For a party I would suggest taking just one or two friends (you could ask his teacher who he sits next two) to the cinema.
As for making friends, if he is 10 already soon to be 11, then try not to worry as the move to secondary school will 'shake up' any friendships and provide lots of opportunities for making new ones anyway.
Or something like cubs/scouts/woodcraft folk could be good.

Hi there. I am the DH to LittleMilla. Picked up the lingo! This is my first post so apologies!!

Finka1 well done for joining mumsnet. I think this is a brilliant website and I am sure you will get some sage advice.

My youger sister has downs syndrome but was educated in normal schools until the age of 13. I know that she found it difficult to make friends and was bullied at times. The key in my view is to keep them busy and make sure they are signed up to as many opportunities as possible. If music, sport, art, CDT, cookery aren't for him then think about local church clubs, community projects or cubs and scouts as suggested above.

For us my sister's birthday was and still is all about family. It is he most special day of the year for us as a result. Get all the family round to celebrate and make him feel special. That is all anyone really needs on their birthday. Favourite meal, followed by all sitting down to watch his favourite movie...

It's so hard when they are struggling with friends isn't it :( my dd1 has adhd and although is very outgoing can be too much for some people, so she doesn't have beat friends but tends to float amongst people. For her bday this year we took her and a couple of friends quadbiking which she loved! They did hotdogs and icecream for kids after and they had a fab day! Would an activity like this work well for him? Something a bit exciting now he's older but with maybe two or three people he likes? Not necessarily from school though does he have mates from outside school?
My dd goes to a taekwondo club where she has met some.good friends and I was amazed at the amount of kids that go that have mild special needs!