Son who does not appear to listen/ understand and has vacant episodes??

[Toni27]

Hi my little boy is 2y 8m old (second child) and has seen a SALT and a paediatrician as he does not appear to listen or understand many things we say. He understands things that he wants eg would you like a biscuit? but other things you ask him he just does not seem to listen or acknowledge he is being spoken to.
He also has vacant episodes lasting for bout 20secs max - he is not epileptic because we had a test.
His speech is not where it should be for his age, he is good at naming things, and says I found, Ive got...., but other than that we cannot have a mini conversation yet.
He loves exploring his world, pressing buttons, turning knobs, and seeing how things work. He is a very loving boy and is not aggressive to others at all. He does headbutt the wall or us if he gets really stressed out and does not want to do something eg go to bed in which case he may haed butt his cot or his pillow.
His development was perfectly normal and he has good eye contact and he has started to take my hand and lead me to something he wants this last week.
He has not got ASD as the paediatirician said he isnt.
I was wondering if it could point towards an attention problem? He can focus for hours on his train track but most other activities he does not want to do or he will only do it for a couple of minutes. I really want to teach him speech through stories but he wont sit down with me for long if at all.
I really hope he catches up and is just a late bloomer with speech and language but just wondered if any else had experiences like this?

My DS was very similar but maybe to a lesser extreme including the 'trancing out'. He is 7yo now and suddenly beginning to concentrate far more on things he isn't interested in. He was never a naughty/ problem child, never really tantrummed etc but just wanted to do what he wanted and showed no interest in anything else.

We never saw any professionals and although DS does has ASD traits (not diagnosed but I work with child who have ASD so know about it) he copes with every day life.

DS did have mild, recurrent glue ear that would drain itself and return (allergy related) has your DS had his ears/hearing tested?

he has and they said his hearing is fine, kind of wish it was all hearing related cos that would explain a lot.
Glad to hear that your son appears to be getting better with concentrating it must be a big relief for you.
Did your son have a speech delay?

He didn't have a speech delay but didn't speak really until he was 2 except for a few words. He had 2 languages though as lived abroad until he was 22 months - that can cause delay.

His hearing was fine but the glue ear did affect his concentration as it was muffled when too much noise iyswim although hearing someone face to face or on a hearing test wasn't a problem.

He is still in a world of his own, totally easily distracted and completely disorganised with an appalling memory for doing things/ following instructions. I just have to work round this.

I second what youarekidding has said. MY DS2 has had terrible glue ear and needed gromits etc and is still away with the fairies. His consultant said because of his patchy hearing he had almost trained himself not to listen and I am forever calling him, reminding him of things etc [he is 10] He has very low levels of concentration and apparently would miss the beginings and ends of sentences.

okay thanks for your feedback its really helpful, I have often wondered if just one hearing test was enough - I may request further tests as I wonder if his hearing is intermittent, some days my son seems to pick up a lot and says many new phrases, then he will have a few days/ weeks of not making much progress, if he had a glue ear I guess this could mean that at times he cannot hear well and other times he can - my little girl had a glue ear once which burst at 14 months then never came back, but ear probs could run in the family. Thanks very much xx