soiling and pull ups- school v nurse!

[Brooklyngirl]

Anyone else struggled with juggling what is best for DS,5 who hasn't toilet trained yet? School requires him in yr 1 to wear pull ups. We reluctantly agreed at start of school year due to misery suffered in reception ( us and ds!) but it seems to have helped with his confidence at school, although he is not making any progress in the toileting department. His continence nurse now wants to stop him wearing them. What do you think? Feel caught between school and medics.

Request a review meeting attended by SENCO, teacher and continence nurse.

If he wets and soils in school without protection, then there is a risk that he will suffer socially with his peers. His continence nurse needs to understand that it is a balance with his friendships and inclusion against the mechanical need to be dry.
Are you working on a care plan with the school, where he can be regularly toileted to stimulate his body into beginning to recognise the signals that mean he needs the toilet?

Thanks for replies- meeting with SENCO, teacher and nurse is imminent I think, so that's why I was asking. He is checked regularly at school (he doesn't wet himself, just poos) and has 1 hours assistance paid for a day( currently from teaching assistant at lunchtime) but teacher doesn't always have classroom assistant so difficulty is with putting plan into place at school that is workable. he fights "toilet time" as he's yet to see any success from it. Just welcome as much advice as possible before meeting.

i think that if wearing the pull-ups is helping with his confidence, and is keepiong him dry and happy at school then you should continue with them

i can't imagine it's very nice for him being in wet/soiled clothes a lot of the time at school and it's going to get more and more obvious to the other children as well.

you can argue that he also wasn't making any progress in the toileting department when he was wearing pants either, so I am not sure that it's relevant tbh. you can still do everything you need to do in terms of toilet training if he is wearing pull-ups, with the added bonus of him being happier

that was my way of thinking. Thanks for support.