Social Confidence - 3.9 year old DS

[ButHeNeverDid]

We had a meeting with my Ds's early years techer yesterday.

She told us something that I guess we knew already that our DS is very good at interacting with adults (though always a bit shy at first) but is very hesitant about joining in activities with other children.

He will always stand back looking into a group of kids playing, obvioulsy wanting to join in - but not quite having the confidence to just go for it.

Its not that he is still at he parallel play stage as he has a twin who is very happy to play with at hope.

Anyone got any ideas about what we can do about this? I have started having a few playdates just so he can mix with the kids outside of nursery - but what else?

All the other kids just seem to get on with it!

Hi there, my 3.5 year old sounds exactly the same as your little one. It's hard to watch them struggle and you want everyone to see the wonderful, happy playful child you have at home. I think the main thing is just to let them go at their own pace. In time they will build up enough confidence in the new surroundings and other children to start joining in. Just make sure and praise any effort he makes to join in and tell him it's ok if he doesn't want to just yet. Playdates are a great idea as well and will help him to feel more comfortable at pre school. He will get there and in his own way.

Some kids don't get it at their own pace. You might have to actively 'teach' him how to join in. We used role-playing with DD, as she wasn't mixing at all (but was doing fine at home). Could you ask his teacher to help, or to set up scenarios where he is able to join in?