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5 year old boy biting at school

4 replies

theyseekhimhere · 04/11/2011 20:06

What will happen if this carries on? He's in year one now and it happened several times in reception - sometimes biting, sometimes hitting or stone throwing. Always unacceptable aggression. It always has a reason behind it, if a spurious one - he was sitting in my place, or he wouldn't let me hold the rope. It's happened three or four times this year.
The teachers come across as helpful and lovely. He's got good friends at school. He attends a "feelings group" at lunchtime. He knows it isn't okay. But he can't seem to control himself in that moment.
Generally he's happy at school and home is happy and peaceful except for normal 5 year old exasperations and his 2 year old assertive attention-stealing sister, which is an issue. Sometimes he is aggressive towards her and vice versa. We respond firmly and immediately to both of them, I think.
I'm really sad about it and not sure how to respond. I feel that we're handling it in all the right ways and being consistent and clear that it is unacceptable. But it keeps happening.
Will they just end up excluding him? I'm so sad that he is hurting his friends and I feel completely out of control and unable to change anything. But scared that this is really serious bad behaviour.

OP posts:
531800000008 · 04/11/2011 20:30

well, biting at age 5 is at the far side of what could be considered usual BUT it is a very effective method of getting what you want

what consequences do school issue?

theyseekhimhere · 04/11/2011 20:53

Thanks for responding :)
He misses playtimes, and has to go and see the headteacher.
I wonder what he wants then - attention I'm guessing.

OP posts:
MandMand · 11/11/2011 19:38

I'm having exactly the same problem with my 5 year old DS, also in year 1. He lost his golden time today for biting a girl (who he usually gets on well with) for no apparent reason, other than to get a reaction out of her.

I feel terrible, and don't know how I will be able to look her mother in the eye on Monday morning. My son is the "bad boy" all the other parents will be gossiping about and not wanting their children to sit next to.

We have talked and talked with him about why this sort of behaviour is wrong, and have enforced consistent consequences/punishments, but it feels like one step forwards and two steps back. I'm meeting with his teacher next week to discuss his behaviour and see what else she suggests we might be able to do.

Tgger · 11/11/2011 22:14

Do you mind me asking what do you do if he hurts his sister? Is he upset at your discipline- ie is it getting through to him? Could you up your discipline with it at home or do you think you are already as tough as you could be!?

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