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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

What do you do when other peoples DCs misbehave/ wont do what they are asked?

8 replies

shebird · 19/10/2011 21:15

Just wondered how you deal it when your DCs have friends to play or you are asked to pick up a friends DC from school and they start being cheeky. My DD(7) has some friends who up to now have seemed fairly normal and well behaved. Just lately when they've been around or I've picked up from school they've been so rude and cheeky!! Is this an age thing and even worse is my DD like this with her friends DPs?

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ellesabe · 19/10/2011 21:42

My dd is only a baby still so I don't really have any experience of this but can't you just say... "I don't tolerate that kind of rudeness in this house. If you can't be polite then I will call your parents and ask them to come and collect you"

Chundle · 19/10/2011 21:45

Yep I have this and I tell them that "I'm sure your mum won't be happy when I tell her that your doing XYZ"

helpmabob · 19/10/2011 21:46

But then you have to call the parents which can lead to a political nightmare. I am watching this in the hope for tips.

ellesabe · 19/10/2011 21:47

That's a good point. Maybe chundle's tactic is better!

cat64 · 19/10/2011 21:53

This reply has been deleted

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Pandemoniaa · 20/10/2011 12:32

I used to put my "teacher voice" on tell the occasional rude guest that we didn't behave like that "in this house" and would set out some fair expectations so nobody was under any illusion. If a child was a "repeated offender" and was completely resistant to any requests to desist then actually, I didn't encourage them to come round!

ragged · 20/10/2011 12:55

I dunno, I must be very scarey, I just don' t have those problems with other people's kids.

I would say "Now listen everybody, we all need to be nice" or "Sorry guys, but I simply cannot allow behaviour like that". And it works (shrug). Sometimes I have to hover or suggest that someone might have to go home if things don't improve. It's not even a big deal, just a fact.

I am a wimp with adults but I don't seem to ever have difficult kids to visit. Even the boy in DS's year group who is supposed to be a nightmare child was a perfect angel when he came to visit (3.5 years ago, mind).

MIND, I do have a DC who probably is the one who visits elsewhere and doesn't listen and gets totally over excited and leads to threads like these. I find him quite a handful too, If it makes you feel any better. He was banned from visiting his own granny for 3 years...

I suppose getting to know DS over time it's getting easier for me to understand how to calm him down, get him to focus, get him to cooperate. But it's knowing the child, knowing what makes him tick.

Davsmum · 20/10/2011 14:09

My son had a friend who was considered a 'bad lad' - None of the parents would let him come over to play or anywhere near their house. People were hostile to him because of his naughtiness but I never had much of a problem with him. I was always very friendly to him but at the same time would pull him up very firmly if he got out of line. Because he didn't just get attention from me when he was 'bad', he had some respect for me.
You have to be confident and clear on what behaviour you will tolerate - and the child can pick up on this.

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