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Behaviour/development

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Original poster

I bought my son a doll

42 replies

Ticklemonster2 · 07/10/2011 21:00

my son is 16 months old and loves trucks and diggers. He has lots of boys toys. He is also really loving and cuddly. Apparently he cuddles the younger babies at nursery.
We would like to have another baby in the next year or so. Given that he shows a lot of care for other babies I had the great idea of buying him a doll( got him baby alive that coos and bounces). He loves it. He put it on his changing mat and fed it a biscuit. Very sweet role play.
I see no harm in it, but my husbands not so sure. Any thoughts?

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Trills · 08/10/2011 13:06

Why don't you like him playing with the doll, DH? Daddies look after babies too, don't they?

noblegiraffe · 08/10/2011 13:20

My DS has a cuddly monkey that he feeds water and biscuits and puts on the mat for a nappy change. But because monkeys are suitable for boys, no one ever says anything except 'how sweet'.

Onlyboys · 08/10/2011 13:39

Cory - I pictured the car mat you have at your feet in the car! I was thinking no wonder the mum was agog, then re-read your post

Onlyboys · 08/10/2011 13:46

Isn't it true that children don't see the world in gender terms? Their playmates are just that, not boys or girl friends. My DS's nursery encourages his group to play with dolls, cots etc so they can be used to babies and be kind, helpful siblings. I was really pleased with that approach as an only child, who becomes the oldest child, wouldn't have access to other babies and their toys otherwise. My eldest DS has accepted his new brother very well.

TimeWasting · 08/10/2011 14:44

I bought DS a pink buggy. It was the cheapest one, and no way was I paying extra for a blue one. If there'd been a black or red one a few quid more I may have forked out though.
What really confuses people is his baby doll has an entirely blue outfit, but he has decided it's a girl.

MrsDobalina · 08/10/2011 20:30

It's a fab idea, especially to prepare for a younger sibling. DS had a doll and pink stroller at 18m last year when DD was born (pink is actually his favourite colour!) and it was most coveted by him and all his toddler friends. He liked changing it's nappy and washing it. Despite now being car and train mad, he does still a year later play with his baby occasionally.

Bossybritches22 · 08/10/2011 20:38

If it helps your Dh a young friend of my youngest DD was into Barbie when they were both at nursery. He had a Barbie birthday cake & his mother stoically bought him a Barbie set for his 7th birthday.... despite her DH's discomfort.

He is now 14, a lanky, Justin Bieber lookalike with girls falling at his feet.

feedthegoat · 08/10/2011 20:44

I don't see why anyone would see it as a problem.

My ds used to clutch his oopsy daisy doll wherever we went at that age.

He is 6 this month and wrote his christmas list the other day. He has asked for scalextric and a sylvanian families dog family. Doesn't bother me at all if that is what he wants.

Yama · 08/10/2011 20:45

My ds plays with all the 'girly' toys family members bought dd over the years (well, the ones I didn't ban). Dh loves to see him cuddle his toys as much as I do.

What on earth could your dh possibly be worried about?

DazR · 08/10/2011 20:57

My DDs were bought Brio trainset/table, garages etc. as well as girlie toys. As they grew up they enjoyed scalextric car racing along with polly pocket and betty spaghetti. They are both well rounded - one may now be studying mechanical engineering at uni!! (but is having a blast), the other is very into the arts. I'm so very proud of them.

TheLittlestNarwhal · 08/10/2011 21:02

My Ds2 had a doll and stroller when he was about 2, all his friends at the time were girls and he wanted to join in with their play. 'Baby Billy' went everywhere with him for about 18 months.

I remember that DH was not impressed at all, don't really know why Dads feel so threatened by it. :)

olibeansmummy · 09/10/2011 06:59

Ds has a blue pushchair and a pink soft dolly that he stole borrowed long term from his cousin. He also has bottles to feed it and his other teddies with.

He also has cars, bikes etc of course and couldn't be more boy like! Although his favourite colour is pink!

StitchingMoss · 09/10/2011 07:40

Ds had a doll when his brother was born - 2 yrs later and they often play daddies and daddies (as ds1 calls it!) together. Dh has no problem with it at all.

The gender stereotyping pink/blue thing drives me mad.

pinkgirlythoughts · 09/10/2011 12:01

Dp insists on pushing DS's pram whenever we go out- he's so keen to do it that I barely get a look in! And yet he baulks at the idea of us buying a baby doll for Christmas. I agree, it's odd :D

As a teacher, we usually put out, among other things, the doll's house, and the car mat and cars when we have 'choosing time.' Although the boys always dash to the cars, and the girls to the doll's house, within half an hour, ^every single week,* the cars are being played with exclusively by girls, and there's always at least one boy at the doll's house. When I ask who wants to go out to play in the home corner, there's an equal number of boys and girls that want to do it. And these are the boys who are normally the 'run around like crazy, jumping on the climbing frame, pretending to wrestle/shoot each other' type, happily putting on a party dress and pretending to cook the dinner! Kids should be just kids, IMO, not constricted by gender stereotypes.

CAZ46 · 09/10/2011 13:03

Yeah agree with the others. My two boys had dolls and a pink buggy. Did get some strange looks but most of my other mum friends thought it was a great idea.

oldmum42 · 09/10/2011 14:19

All 4 of my DS had/have boy dolls (with all the boy bits!), blue buggy, bottles, nappies, Iron, ironing board and toddler kitchen, as well as all the usual "boy" toys. And they loved playing with them.

With DS1 (now 17), the GrandP and Aunts/uncles of their generation were pretty horrified.... the clear worry was this would make them gay or "soft" in some way..... of course it didn't, but we do have 3 older DS who are fantastic with their much younger brother, DS4, maybe as a result of all that daddy-role-play......

BaronessBatsblood · 09/10/2011 23:41

DS has a buggy and loves it! Actually, "bug-GEE" was the first two-syllabel word he learnt. :) DH was a bit at first but now the two of them tear round the garden together playing with it. I'm thinking of getting him a doll - so far he just feeds his teddies. Oh yes, did I mention his tea set?

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