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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

How do I manage this? Toddler hurting baby as I drive.

39 replies

BagofHolly · 04/10/2011 20:55

DS1 is 2.5, and has a slight language delay, and some trouble communicating. My twins are 9 months, and when I'm driving, especially if I'm talking to DH/any other passenger, DS1 pinches/hits/pokes whichever baby is next to him. They are all is rearfacing seats. I've tried tightening his straps so he can't lean right round but he has long arms and can still pinch their feet.
I've tried bribery, explaining, threats, shouting, rewarding good behaviour, all to largely no avail. What do I do if he's attacking the babies whilst I'm driving???

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

zdcgbjm · 04/10/2011 21:47

Bit of an x post there sorry. Ours don't use headphones with the ipods, I'd be uncomfortable with that for a 2 yr old.

NotJustClassic · 04/10/2011 21:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

dreamfeeder · 04/10/2011 21:50

I'm looking at DD in front seat in her RF (BeSafe), depends which it is and if your seat is isofix/front seat has isofix. I have even bought a second seat 'for the grandparents car' (TWE) for the purpose, but can't get my front airbag off, grrr (well not personally, the garage can't)

I think one twin will have to go in a different row if DH with you in car, and DS in front with you if not. That's my vote!! If he likes being smacked for the attention, I'm flummoxed!! (and oh but how they love attention)

Original poster

BagofHolly · 04/10/2011 21:54

He can operate my iPhone but drops it or negotiates away from the page and then gets frustrated when he cant get back to it. This is one if those points where the passenger intervenes!

If I put the babies in the back row, they can only be belted in, not isofixed and there's no way to tether the pram, so the slightest bump would send it flying around the place. (I'm always careful to put the tonneau over the boot when there's things in there.)

I need a minibus.

OP posts:

sneakybeak · 04/10/2011 21:57

What about a houdini stop strap - should keep straps in place to prevent too much leaning forward?

here

Original poster

BagofHolly · 04/10/2011 22:00

He's much better at home, and his bad behaviour is almost always when I'm unable to get to him. At home I can change what I'm doing and distract him, but I'm hamstrung whilst driving.

His seat is a Besafe Combi I think.

OP posts:

Original poster

BagofHolly · 04/10/2011 22:03

Sneakybeak, you star! My friend mentioned this to me and for the life of me I couldn't remember what it was called! I've improvised with a carabiniere and in desperation, a kilt pin but I hate doing it cos they're such a bugger to remove. Am ordering one now. That should curb his prodding to some extent at least!

OP posts:

sneakybeak · 04/10/2011 22:10

I use one for my DS (22 months) and it is really good. Good luck!

ClaudiaSchiffer · 04/10/2011 22:21

Bit of cardboard to create a barrier between the baby and ds? Ugly but would keep him isolated and it may only take one or two trips with it until he learns that you mean business?

When my dd used to do this to baby sister I used to stop the car and yell. But it's very difficult when they are so young.

Original poster

BagofHolly · 04/10/2011 22:27

Cardboard is a v good idea. Will have a poke in the garage and see what we've got - got a fairly long trip tomorrow and my nerves will be shredded if I have to put up with this for much longer.

OP posts:

bonkers20 · 04/10/2011 22:32

I don't think those Houdini clips are approved for use in Europe - something to do with it taking longer to remove the child from the seat in the event of an accident.

Other than cardboard, you could try and hang blankets from the ceiling.

sneakybeak · 04/10/2011 22:38

I heard that actually about the safety of those clips. TBH it was a risk assessment. My DS got out of his straps a few times, at speed, on the motorway. It was terrifying, and happens quickly. Once he'd learnt how to do it, I was f*cked.

I got the strap, and he can't do it any more, he doesn't even try.

In my mind, that's MUCH safer than the alternative.

If we were in an accident, he'd be cut out anyway, what's one more strap?

I don't mean to sound flippant, but when you weigh it up, I'd rather have my kids strapped in properly than fannying around trying to coach them into staying put.

Wouldn't blankets just cause a rear view obstruction anyway?

Esian · 04/10/2011 23:00

How about a big road atlas between them? Or else fabric attached (sellotaped?) between the back seat and the front seat, or babyseat. If the twins are out of sight, it might work.

bonkers20 · 05/10/2011 09:04

sneaky Oh, I agree with you entirely on the risk assessment. I only wanted to make people aware.

We do all sorts of things which are not the statistically safest thing to do (get in the car in the first place comes to mind!). I've put a baby seat in the front when the back seat was free because IMO it was safer for me to drive with a calm baby ie one who could see me, than one who was howling for 2 hours.

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