Are Second Kids Always Easier?

[NotQuiteCockney]

DS1 is 4y3m. DS2 is 1y3m. DS2 is less work. He just carries on and does his own thing all the time. I can get quite a bit done with him underfoot, without having to deal with loads of requests and questions.

Yet I'm sure DS1 was more work at one year than he is now.

Also, whenever I borrow other people's kids, I find only kids to be the hardest work, followed by first children. Second, or better still middle kids are easy!

Is this true for everyone?

Dd is supposed to be just like me too. Can't say I'm proud of it at the moment though

I hope so...

Well, my second child was an easy baby, compared to my first, who was very demanding on attention. But then I had dts and they are little buggers! They have jsut learned to sleep through at 9 months, they've taken forever to wean, clingy, destructive - generally (loveable) little monsters. Just when I thought I had got the hang on this parenting lark, they came along to prove me wrong.

As a baby ds1 was probably the most difficult but ds2 is more than making up for lost time. It's exhausting just being in the same room as ds2.

ha!

NO NO NO NO NO

Bit like Trefusis on this one. DD easier small baby although she wasn't great but DS was really hard work and colicky, then it swapped over on the 6-9 month bit, then DD easier again at 9-12 months because she got moving so wasn't frustrated as much. But DS was an angel toddler, very easy-going, sleeping through, eating a good range of foods. DD has not been a too difficult toddler these last 6 months but she is a lot less capable of independent play than DS was and also very jealous of my attention. I suppose DS was the same but it was so rarely an issue. DS was a more difficult 3 yo and also hard work when he first started school. He settled down after half term but is hyped up again now leading up to Christmas.

DS is much easier when DD is not there. DD has generally been easier when DS has been there.

My DD is a dream compared to DS ...
DS was a screamer from day 1 and is still, at 6 years old a high maintenance child ... he finds it hard to entertain himself and is always saying, "What can I do now?" Terrible terrible sleeper until the age of 5 and a half.
DD didn't cry until she was about 4 months ... slept better from day 1 (I remember standing outside DS's room in the middle of the night when he was 4 and a half and she was 3 months old wondering why I was getting up 3 times a night for him and not even once for her)
She (now 22 months) always plays well and entertains herself ...
Her tantrums are more spectacular than DS's but that is only because I can't always distract her like I could with him ...
The only way she is harder work is with eating ... DS was and is brilliant with food, she on the other hand is terrible ... lives on sausages and bananas.

It has certainly been true for us, NQC! Although I would advise a degree of caution. DS2 was not stroppy at all as a two year old but when he was three, the stubborn side of his nature really began to come out. Most of the time he is sweet but when he doesn't want to do something, he is as thran as a pig, as his Irish granny would say!

My DS2 certainly shows signs of great willfullness now. I actually enjoy willfullness in kids, though, I like them having some character and wanting things, even things they can't have.

I suspect a lot of the difference is down to more relaxed, confident parenting.

I had a long chat with an old friend last night, whose DS1 is bizarrely easy, really really very obedient, quiet and manageable. Shy, but that doesn't bug her. Her DS2 is more ... normal. Much like my DS2, actually. She describes her DS2 as "trouble". I think mine is easy. It may have a lot to do with your frame of reference.

(I did try to convince her that her DS1 is probably up to something really bad, like weapons of mass destruction or serial murder, but I don't think I managed it.)