Baby cries when falling asleep

[LilyPilley]

My DD is 12 weeks and cries everytime she falls asleep. I have tried getting her to fall asleep in the swing, buggy or sling but she will only fall asleep by being rocked and even so, she cries anywhere from 5-30 minutes before falling asleep. It's like she doesn't know how to deal with feeling tired. I hate that she cries even though I'm giving love and cuddles, singing and rocking, everything I think should promote sleeping.

I do look out for tired cues as it's harder when she's overtired. I have also put her in her crib (clean, fed and tired) but the crying is worse and I can tell she won't fall asleep and I don't feel comfortable with CIO methods. Should I consider it with the view that this will teach her how to fall asleep??

Has anyone experience this with their LO? Is it just a phase and if so, when will she grow out of it? Any advice is much appreciated.

please don't try CIO at the moment - she is still quite tiny and even controlled crying isn't recommended until 6 months. It isn't the same thing to cry to sleep while being cuddled by someone who loves them, even though it is hard for you.

Can you try both of you lying on your bed while you cuddle her until asleep? You could also try putting a hot water bottle on her mattress before she goes to bed so it is warm when she gets into the crib. Can you rock the crib at all? You could also consider getting a Amby hammock or something like that - they are expensive new but come up on ebay. I also strongly recommend the No Cry Sleep Solution. Good luck.

DD does this too. You have my sympathy - it's hard work!

She's 20 weeks now and bedtime has got easier in the last few weeks. The first few weeks were a nightmare though. We used to have about 45 minutes of hysteria before she'd go to sleep. DH found that if she got really upset when being rocked/ cuddled to sleep, it helped if he'd sit her on his knee in a darkened room until she calmed down. Once calm, he'd rock her and put her down in the cot. This has made the whole process loads quicker and less painful.

Daytime naps are still a work in progress - it doesn't seem to matter how quickly we react to her tiredness signs, there are still lots of tears.

I'm watching to see if anybody more experienced that me has any good advice!

What makes this situation so much worse is that she doesn't sleep very long once I put her down. Before 10 at night, I can put her down anywhere and she will wake in 10-15 minutes but if I keep her in my arms she will sleep for a good hour, sometimes two. I keep her in my arms from 7-10 just to ensure she has a bedtime routine. If she knew how to fall asleep, perhaps she would have longer naps?

It took me a while to realise that if I put my DD in a quiet room alone she will only cry for 2-5 mins then sleep as opposed to crying 30 mins plus in my arms.

My DS is also 20 weeks and I find that too much fussing and intervention can make it worse. I used the baby whisperer methods of shhh patting. It's now moved on to more lullaby and back rubbing. Highly recommend you read the book and adapt to suit your style of parenting.

He doesn't always need me to go in to him and 9/10 will go off of his accord. But some general fussing and crying is normal, in my experience - be it in cot, car or buggy. But there's a definite difference between a bit of grizzling and full on crying, so don't feel that you should leave her if she's really sad.

Get DH to help as much as possible - I can be weak (!) and would often cave and just give him boob. But in the long run, it's MUCH better that they're able to fall asleep of their own accord.

My baby is just over 10 weeks old. She is generally a happy baby and sleeps well at night but she really struggles cuddling in my arms. She much prefers being up right over the shoulder. She does suffer really badly with wind and seems to be constantly farting all day. We also believe she has silent reflux so has been on anti-reflux formula since around 4/5 weeks.

As soon as we cradle her in our arms she starts crying. She doesn’t settle until we bounce her up and down whilst walking around the room. She starts to fall asleep in this position and then every few minutes she gripes in pain and starts screaming and crying in pain. We then bounce her up and down or pat her bum and she drifts off to sleep again. This goes on for a good 10-20 mins until she is in a deep sleep.

Thjs is only during the day because she won’t sleep independently but at night she is absolutely fine. Goes down in her crib and stays there for most of the night.

Just wondering if it is just colic or if we should be worried there is something else going on. Any advice would be much appreciated.