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At my wits end with 8yr old ds. Don't know what to try next.

28 replies

TheOriginalNutcracker · 13/09/2011 17:01

He is currently upstairs in his room, smashing and trashing it all over him not being able to have a packet of biscuits only 2 minutes after he'd eaten some crisps.

He has at least 2 tantrums like this a day, and I am all out of ideas. I always follow through with any punishments given but it is like he forgets the consequences as soon as the punsihment is over.

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
TheOriginalNutcracker · 17/09/2011 20:46

Sorry for the delay in coming back to this.

I have asked him over and over what it is about school that he doesn't like, but all he ever says is that he hates the work. He likes to play and does alot better in a situation where they learn through play/acting out rather than sitting at a desk all day.

He has just started year 4 and he has two teachers. He said he likes both of them but doesn't like the work. I asked if it is too hard and he said sometimes yes somtimes no.

Both of his sisters are now in secondary school so I could move him without much trouble, but because i'm not really sure what the problem is, i'm not sure what i'd be looking for in a new school.

His dad and I are seperated and his day makes little to no effort to see him even though he lives within a 2 min walk. He only really sees him if I eed his dad to have him for an hour while i pop out or if his sisters go round and he tags along.
I have spent many a time trying to get xp to realise that he needs to improve his relationship with ds but it falls on deaf ears.

I took him to a police/fire fun day today and he was so grumpy. He wouldn't try look at any of the cars or anything although to be fair he said he was scared. He did stand nicely and watch the dog display, although he freaked out everytime the siren went off on the car behind us. He then got chest pains, but said he didn't know why. We just sat and chilled for a bit and then he was ok.
He had about 3 tantrums whilst we were there over pretty trivial stuff, and then one huge one on the way back to the car. He went to run off and so i just held onto him tight and made him sand still until he stopped shouting.

The stuff i ordered from ebay came while i was out, so i am going to sit with him tomorrow and go through that and get him to fill in which things he thinks need to be on the chart.

OP posts:
TheOriginalNutcracker · 17/09/2011 20:47

Sorry, also ment to add that I am going to see how this week goes and if things are no better I am going to ask to see the senco again.

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Kiwiinkits · 18/09/2011 00:01

Sorry to hear about his Dad not being on the scene. It really is so important - somehow Dad needs to be told, by you or by someone else, that now is the time to step up to the plate. It makes me so sad to hear about pre-adolescent boys being neglected by their dads, grrrrr! It is such an important time in their lives.

This is a little bit out there, but sometimes nutritional deficits can impact behaviour and can cause tantrum behaviour. My nephews improved SO MUCH after their mum improved their diet and cut out lots of the processed shite she was feeding them. Common deficits are magnesium, omega 3 and folates. Is he getting enough fish and lots of green, leafy vegetables in his diet?

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