Should I leave him at the babysitters for the first time when he asleep or awake?

[BoSho]

I know this sounds a bit lame, but I'm a stay-at-home mum, thinking of starting a course a few hours a day for a few days a week, and I'm nervous about leaving my one year old with a babysitter for the first time, so would appreciate some advice.

My son is finally sleeping through the night and has a really great routine. He normally wakes at 6, has a 1 hour nap at 8, eats lunch at 11.45 and then has a 1.5 - 2 hour nap at 12.30, after which time he's up until his bedtime at 7pm.

I can give more details if necessary, but basically my class will be every thursday and friday from 1 'til 4, and (if I go ahead with it) my son will be looked after at another family's house, and I'm want to know how get him to take his afternoon nap.

Should I:

a) Take him to the house where the babysitter is at 12, give him his lunch there, get him used to everyone then get him to sleep myself (I'm assuming there's a cot - otherwise we could buy a travel cot I suppose, haven't got the details yet) and leave. Then he'll have to wake up without me there :(

b) Take him, get him settled and happy, then leave and hope the babysitter can get him to sleep

c) Do some kind of trial run (the course starts on sept 20th, so I don't have much time)

d) Forget the course and stay at home with my lovely son (going a bit mental because I no longer have a life of my own).

Thanks. Hope I can get the confidence to do this. The course would be great for me (and him. I'm English, and it's a Dutch course that will help me to finally crack the language for when he goes to a Dutch pre-school when he's 2) but I don't want to do it if it will make him miserable. Every time we've been out and he's woken up, we've had to come home because no-one else can settle him.

Definitely do c) if you can, you'll feel much more relaxed on your course if you've left him before and you know he was ok last time.

I'm starting back at work on the 20th and have been leaving my 14 month DD with my childminder for a few days a week for the last couple of weeks to get both DD and myself used to her going to the childminder before she has to go.

If you can't do c) then do b) because I'd worry more about him potentially waking up in a strange place without you then not being able to sleep without you.

Don't do d) that's just silly :)

Let the babysitter nap him. Although I used to put DS down for a nap and his grandparents looked after him while I had a 2 hour driving lesson and he'd wake and I'd not be there. He was fine although a bit grumpy (and a similar age). He did know his grandparents very well though having seen them weekly since birth. I also told him they'd be coming.

def c - has he been left with anyone before - if not don't panic if there first few times are a bit tricky -he will settle -
so if you can fit in a couple of short visits/and leaving him for say 1 hour I woudl do it
sounds like a great plan - re course

OK. I'll do it! Babysitter getting him to sleep is totally sensible. He knows and likes her, so I think he'll be OK. Will talk to her tomorrow and see if I can do a couple of trial runs for an hour each - good idea. Shall I just forget about the sleeping bit for the trial d'you think, and just take him after his afternoon nap when he's all happy, or do a trial sleep (if it works, he'll be there for 2 hours!)

Trial sleep might not work if you're there and could stress you out.

I'd leave him the first time for an hour when he is happy
2nd time maybe for trial sleep but leave before he goes for it

OK, good point Iggly. I'll go once for an hour, then if that works I'll think about leaving him to sleep AnOtherName. TBH, not sure I'll have time for more than one trial run, but it's a good idea if I can. Thanks!

I hope it goes well!

Thank you! God, the thought of leaving him is really hard. Hopefully this is the start of me getting back to normal again though, so it'll be worth it ;)

if he knows and likes the babysitter should be fine