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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

can you recommend me a good harness/reins and also give me advice on how to avoid grief from silly people while using it?

58 replies

muslimah28 · 11/09/2011 17:39

hello

ds is very active and i like letting him walk, but just need to keep him safe when he tries to run off. can anyone recommend a good brand?

i heard the sunshine kids is not so good, purely for the long length of the harness which youd think would be a good thing but i read some reviews of people getting grief for using it cos its too 'obvious'. these people recommended the backpack type, but i'm worried about whether they're strong enough/good enough quality- anything gimmicky like that starts to compromise on quality IME.

any advice?

also any tips on how to use it which may minimise risk of anyone telling me i'm treating my child like a dog. like i should care more about a dog than my child....

please dont post if you're fundamentally against harnesses/reins, i'm not looking for a debate, just some recommendations on products!

many thanks :)

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HummusNKetchup · 12/09/2011 22:46

I did have a couple of comments from older people but I explained that my boys were exactly like dogs and if I didn't take them out for some exercise and then give them a biscuit they'd be driving me up the wall.

said with such obvious sincerity it shut them up :)

SybilBeddows · 12/09/2011 22:49

well yes Meglet, children DO like pretending to be dogs IME, my ds1 is always licking my face and claiming he's a puppy

BambinoBoo · 13/09/2011 14:08

Another user here of the little life rucksack. No negative comments however, just the opposite. A woman actually stopped me and said she wishes more people would use reins as years ago her husband had seen a little girl run out in the road as her mother spoke to someone and the girl has died and that it had haunted her husband from that day on.

DedalusDigglesPocketWatch · 13/09/2011 14:17

We used some basic webbing reins that got passed down to us. They were good and I have them ready and waiting to use on ds!

Only one person in real life has commented on us using the reins, and that was when I mentioned that I had heard lots of people were against them but I couldn't understand why. Her reply "But then you have grown up with dogs and horses, so it would seem normal to you" Probably not helped by me always saying to dd "Come on little pony, time to put your bridle on" :o

Galena · 13/09/2011 19:56

I have some standard ones from ASDA for DD. She has cerebral palsy so is quite unsteady on her feet. Holding a hand destabilises her core and causes her to become even more unstable! For her, reins are ace - she can walk, I can stop her wandering off, but I don't have to hold her hand, throwing off her balance. Also, as she falls quite often, I can save some of the nastier bumps!

We do have a Little Life backpack, but for her it's not so good because it's only a single rein (1 contact point) as opposed to two.

pumpupthevolume · 13/09/2011 23:13

Another vote for the Little Life rucksack. We gave the bee one: www.littlelife.co.uk/html/toddler_daysacks/animal-bee.html And dd calls it her "bee bag". I can put my hand through the loop and then hold her hand so it's like a backup for if she bolts ( and she does!). I always put something nice in as a surprise, like one of her toys, or a book, or a drink, because I want her to enjoy wearing it...

cory · 14/09/2011 11:01

I used ordinary reins. The only comment I remember is some Americans coming up to us at Heathrow airport and asking "where can you get those?"

coffeeaddict · 14/09/2011 11:17

I am clearly very cushioned as I had no idea there was an anti-reins movement. What is the so-called problem with reins? I have the Lindam backpack which my toddler loves. He strode around in it on holiday and I was asked by about five mothers 'where did you get that?'

Eralc · 14/09/2011 12:35

I only had positive comments about mine - we had reins for when DS was little, and then a little life backpack when he was bigger (and since we moved to Australia, I've had loads of people stopping me to ask me where I got the backpack from - as far as I know you can't get them over here)

coffeeaddict · 14/09/2011 15:15

I am obsessing about why people are anti-reins. Why?! Surely reins are better for a toddler's walking development than hand-holding, in that the toddler can have both arms free to balance rather than than having one hand yanked up in the air all the time? Reins are certainly better for MY posture.

I'm sure some enterprising reins company will do some research along these lines and there will be a piece on the Today programme and every worried parent will rush out to buy them..... :)

sarahtigh · 14/09/2011 15:53

i have and use webbing ones from mothercare blue red green and yellow so not gilry not boyish she is 21 months old and they are great,
even a little one can twist easily out of hand grip and run, if you are tall you don't get back ache holding hands, gives them both hands free helps prevents falls means if you need to look at something you can slip reins on your wrist and they can't bolt, you can still easily carry them without taking them off , they are not bulky or heavy,
when she is a bit bigger might get the rucksack version

get them use them and ignore the rest
every single aspect of childcare as its evangelical pro people and those you think its tantamount to child abuse; routine/ baby led bf/ff disciplining methods gender toys etc etc

Bunbaker · 14/09/2011 16:01

"I am obsessing about why people are anti-reins. Why?! Surely reins are better for a toddler's walking development than hand-holding, in that the toddler can have both arms free to balance rather than than having one hand yanked up in the air all the time? Reins are certainly better for MY posture."

They are probably from jealous vertically challenged parents who think they don't need reins because they can reach their LO's hands comfortably. OH and I are both tall, so not having reins wasn't an option.

sarahtigh · 14/09/2011 16:54

the antis think that putting your child in reins is like putting a lead on a dog and demanding obedience and mastery over them

SurprisEs · 14/09/2011 17:04

Ignore the nasty comments.

Funkyfairy (online store) sell some cute ones which are animal back packs. Very strong and DD loved using it because it was a dog and all those silly things. Also the handle comes off with a clip so you can leave the "backpack" on even when not in use.

SurprisEs · 14/09/2011 17:06

I've never ever heard a bad comment towards me when using reins though...

TwoIfBySea · 14/09/2011 17:09

I only ever got a few disapproving looks when dts were little and all reined up. My answer was to give the straps a little flick, pony style and say "mush!" Dts loved it and would start trotting and the sticky beaks would huff away! Great fun.

StitchingMoss · 14/09/2011 17:11

Another user of the Little Life backpack - tried reins initially but both DC would just swing of them which drove me mad. Never do this with reins.

Only ever had positive comments - and a few weeks ago in Greenwich had a whole army of Japanese tourists queuing up to take photos of DS2 with his backpack on .

ceebeegeebies · 14/09/2011 17:11

I think that the only people that comment are those that have not had 'runners' as DC otherwise they would completely understand the need for reins!

Just ignore any comments - let them wash over you and feel completely happy that you are keeping your DS safe

StitchingMoss · 14/09/2011 17:12

Never do this with backpack I meant !

Thumbwitch · 14/09/2011 17:14

I had the ones from Mothercare - the loop unclips to give a longer length as they become more stable on their feet, but when DS was little it saved him from numerous bangs and bruises!

Pros:
it leaves them with both hands free to help balance and explore as they're walking along
It helps to stop them falling when they trip
Obviously stops them from slipping out of your grasp into traffic/the pond in a nanosecond
Safer than wristbands, which can cause dislocations and don't stop them from falling
better than holding their hand if you're quite tall - saves them from shoulder strain and you from back strain

And if anyone gives you evils over it, or mentions dogs, just TELL them that you care more about your child than your dog and you'd rather not take the chance thank you.

DS learnt to hold my hand whilst also on the reins - so that when he came off them, he still held my hand (and still does, at 3.9)

Mind you, most people didn't say anything to me at all about them - a couple of older ladies mentioned that it was a good thing he was wearing them when I caught him before his nose smashed into the pavement though!

startail · 14/09/2011 17:37

DD1 went everywhere on reins, as soon as she learnt to crawl she learnt to vanish.
They were also necessary to clip her into supermarket trollies (I had her climb out onto the till belt the time I forgot, the waist belts didn't work).
Ordinary webbing ones, backpacks didn't exist. Tried wrist straps when i had second DD in the buggy, but they were too long and tangled. Fortunately she got better at staying put by 3. DD2 didn't run off so never needed reins (just as well because dD1 understood about roads at 2 and she was still dippy at 5)

pramsgalore · 15/09/2011 14:33

littlelife rucksack are great and i still take the lead off the rucksack and clip it to ds trouser loop [5 years old] when he is near busy roads etc

CocktailQueen · 15/09/2011 19:47

Littlelife backpack here!

planetpotty · 15/09/2011 19:49

Me to on the little life - we have the shark one :)

Pah to anyone who thinks reighns etc are a bad idea ...... they must have had one hell of a well behaved 2 YO! :)

FoxyRevenger · 15/09/2011 20:56

So what kind of size are the little life backpacks then?

Would they be ok for a 15 month old?

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