"It scared me"

[FlameRobin]

DD is 2 1/2, and right now everything from the dark to Fairly Odd Parents on Nick Toons she is telling me is scaring her.

Its been since Halloween - she caught onto the word when she genuinely was scared by halloween masks, and since then "It dared me" is all I seem to hear. The dark, sudden loud noises, creepy music does seem to be genuine scared - the rest of the time, she is just saying it.

It seems slightly mean to tell her she is being silly, like its belittling what she is telling me, but how do I deal with the times when she is clearly not scared, but just saying it???

bump

Maybe she is?

Fairly odd parents is quite odd and creepy for little children

I would take it at face value and give her a cuddle

dd2 is a scaredy cat too but I let her - nothing worse than jollying along when you really are frightened

lol, I thought that with FOP!!! - her puzzle scared her the other day when she couldn't do it, and her shoes....

hmmm

then probably has become a byword for 'I dont want to' or 'its beyond me'

pander! She's only wee.

dd is the same age and has started saying 'don't like it' and crying to slightly scary things on tv which she would have happily watched before (ie most Disney films). I think it's her age and she's suddenly aware of a whole new emotion. Maybe just help her to understand what it applies to. As in 'yes, that is a bit scary' or 'no, that's just your shoes!'

Could just be that she is against my taste in shoes!!! It all sounds so obvious and logical the way you both put it .

Ds has a pair of grey socks which he detests, and he protests they are scary, and will cry if you try to make him wear them. I agree it is the strongest term of dislike he knows how to express.

Quite chuffed really as grey socks are indeed vile.

Sounds like when I took DD shopping with me... any trousers I tried on that she didn't like she told me were hurting me

I think they just feel things quite intensely and haven't yet learnt to feign otherwise. Being made to wear something they really don't like could genuinely make them feel pain or fear. I know it would upset me, if I was in the same situation, and they are only 2.

Ds is nearly the same age and also started saying things were 'scary' around Hallowe'en (heavily reinforced by Bonfire Night and dratted fireworks). I think he's very rarely actually scared, more enjoying acting it out and exploring this new concept. But I go along with it, give him a cuddle, say something like 'Oh dear, it is a bit scary, but it's all right really.' Or, with the fireworks, told him we were safe inside. Or with the Big Bad Wolf explained that our house is made out of bricks!

Bless him, when the fireworks were going on for the third night, he was telling me 'It's all right mummy, safe inside.'

DS1 nearly 4 now was scared of just about everything at that age, I just gave him a cuddle and told him it was ok, mummy's here etc and he got over it (well most of it, there's still the odd thing that bothers him). No matter how 'silly' I thought his fear to be I didn't let on as it was obviously very real to him. Just had an inward smile to myself when he'd gone off to play

DD went through a few weeks of this very recently (nearly 2): I think she was using her newish word 'scared' to express a whole range of anxiety/fear/excitement/concern etc. I was baffled as to how to handle it too - in the end, the thing that worked best was to just acknowledge her ie 'oh I see, you're scared of the train' and not give it too much importance. If she seemed really anxious, I'd also add 'oh, Mummy isn't scared of the train' or 'you're scared of the train. The train is going fast/is noisy that can be a bit scary, but it is really safe/isn't going to hurt you'.

No idea if any of it was right, but she seemed to get past fears quicker than when I tried to over-reassure her or told her it was fine!

Not doing it much anymore, her current favourite is 'Eli angry'. I think she's working through some sort of internal emotional literacy program...

Iam really grateful for this thread - having exactly the same problems with my DD 2 later this month..
She got scared at hallowen by some lad coming to the front door wearing hat and face paint etc on and DD ran to the front door to see who it was - then seemed petrified.. She keeps saying it about our bottom room (3 rooms in a row at this house) I guessed because it was dark outside. But I agree that they do seem to say it when they aren't actually scared. DD says bit dared.. When I say no your not (as it was about getting dressed also) she changed it to say boy dary. so she keeps remembering it. I will try to take your advice as I hated saying that such and such isn't scary (as it is to her) so will gladly try agreeing and then help to make feel better by explaining etc.