I'm really worried about my dd1 behaviour. She is polite and well behaved until she is asked to do something she doesn't want to do. The preschool teacher has now commented on this when she wouldn't take her cardi off to paint or put on an apron. I usually can find ways to make this seem like a good idea or something she should do for x,y and z reasons and she then does it. But she just seems to switch off and not listen or if she does listen and you end up in converstion with her she will argue with you that the sky is red and it doesn't matter what authority you have over her, she seems to think she is in charge despite being told otherwise. I find myself using threats and bribes all the time and this is something I thought I would never do, when i was a perfect parent (pre kids)!!
I am very anxious about squashing her character, she is incrediably confident and I was too at her age (3 y/o), but i lost this and am now shy and can find myself uncomfortable in my own skin in some socail situations, which I would hate to happen to dd. However I feel she needs reigning in and not sure how to do it without crossing that fine line of breaking her sprit and teaching her that she needs to obey the rules. She is quite the social butterfly, but, on the flip side it can be quite irritating to myself and others that she point blank refuses to do things you ask of her. I feel this is my fault and not sure how to improve the situation. Any advice appreciated.