Help! Advice desperately needed re: sleep.

[MummyBuzz]

I know I shouldn't expect miracles given that our DD is only 8 days old but DH and I are tearing our hair out. DD sleeps unconsciously all day and has to be woken up to take feeds and will not stay awake no matter how hard we make her try. She has her last feed before bed at about 9.30/10pm but the second you put her in her cot, that's it, awake and screaming until 5am every night so far. She will fall asleep on my chest and sleep soundly but the minute you put her back in the cot it's like someone is sticking pins in her the way she screams!

This is our first baby and last night DH sat together in bed and cried as we were both just so tired and had tried everything we could think of. Against my better judgement we did try her with a dummy which calms her down for short periods but as soon as it falls out the screaming starts again.

Any advice would be very very welcome before I implode with tiredness!

Well, if it helps MummyBuzz my DD was exactly the same. All I can say is that we did the same things as you, and it does get better, trust me. My DD is now 8 and I sleeps 12 hours a night solid and I have to wake her up!

It is very early days and we felt the same as you, in the end we did (though obviously it is not recommended by Drs!) let DD sleep on us, I know my brother and his wife did too in the early days. We used to sleep sat up right with her on one of those pillows that you can use for pregnancy and breastfeeding. I am not saying you should do this, it is just what we came to in the end. I also remember using a sling during the day whilst I was up and about used help, and rocking her in my arms singing at night and then putting her down, sometimes 5 or 6 times before she would settle.

You could also trying sleeping in shifts if it is at all possible with DH? Or until she settles into her own pattern try sleeping in the day whenever she does (housework can wait) and then being awake when she is? Quite early on (can't remember exactly when but we introduced a nighttime routine too, which also helped.
Two things that also helped DD when she was about 6 weeks is that we stopped using the moses basket and used the cot, and at 8 weeks we moved the cot into her room and by 8.5 weeks she slept 7 hours at night! Again, not saying that you should do this as the recommendation is now 6 months I think. But with both my DCs I found (DS was 5 weeks when he went into his room) that they and we slept much much better.

Good luck, you're doing a great job just follow your instinct and it will all fall into place, I know its a long time away but once you get to 12 weeks things will be loads better! Make the most of the early days too while they are so tiny as they grow really fast, and its just a series of phases that they go through - it will pass.

I felt exactly the same a few weeks ago and first thing to say is that it will get better. DD is very new and this big world is very scary. Try warming her crib with a hot waterbottle before putting her in. You could also put a tshirt or vest that you have been wearing in with her so that she can smell you. Also try putting her in her crib for some of her day time sleeps so she gets used to it (this is one bit of advice I still haven't followed). The other thing is just be patient and do not set yourself expectations of when she will sleep through etc, then you won't be disappointed when it doesn't happen, but thrilled when it does. Oh,and as everyone will have told you, get some sleep in the day. Congratulations btw.

Make the day time as fun and interesting as you can- curtains open, TV on, windows open, go in the garden etc. Bathe her in the evenings then turn the lights low and keep everything calm and boring and she will get the idea soon enough and congratulations.