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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Dummy for sleeping?

11 replies

knittakid · 18/05/2011 20:30

ds is 9 weeks old, we do what could be termed our own kind of attachment parenting, i.e. whatever feels kind of right to us... it's working fine, he sleeps in the bed with me and ussualy falls asleep nursing, but I'd like him to have longer naps on his own, could a dummy be the answer? I hate the things and was hoping he'd suck his thumb, but he just eats his whole hand ( and chokes himself!), but we are open to change our minds!

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gder · 18/05/2011 20:35

Dummies were brilliant for both my boys. I was against them until my first son was poorly as a newborn. They helped them sleep, they helped them settle but the best thing they did was encourage their naps and prolong their enthusiasm for naps until 3 yrs. They both stopped using the dummies easily and they only ever had them in bed and in the car (after the newborn stage).
As a result of all this I am very positive about their controlled use.
Good luck.

Samsmummy2011 · 18/05/2011 20:40

my ds was in special care when he was born and the nursing staff actually asked my to bring a dummy in for him.... so makes you wonder if they are all bad. DS has it to sooth and fall asleep with but soon spits it out when he does not need it and if he is in a "happy" mood will fall asleep without it so in my mind he is not to relient on it.

NickNacks · 18/05/2011 20:42

I agree.

I didn't want to use dummies on mine but it changed our lives (the bit where sleeping is everything!). Easy to get rid of them as long as around 6 or 7 months you make sure they are only used for naps. Never had problems and would say go for it if you think your son needs it. We got rid completely at around 2yrs but could have done it earlier if needed.

DD is 9 months now and just uses hers to get to sleep. She doesn't cry when it falls out and is happy to sleep the rest of the night with it gone.

Original poster

knittakid · 18/05/2011 21:41

Interesting, why do they have such terrible reputation? I know about they interfering with bfing if introduced too early, but surely 9 weeks is ok? and then, later on they can damage teeth? but in between? I think I'll give it a go... my nipples are not dummies!

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Rubyabcd · 18/05/2011 22:09

I have a friend who is up every hour or half an hour as her nine month old baby cries every night whenever it falls out and won't settle until she goes in and puts it back in. Total nightmare!! My baby eleven months has never had a dummy and will settle any time by sucking her thumb, controlled crying is also what I would recommend, they need to learn to settle themselves!!

My baby sleeps twelve hours a night undisturbed!!

SVH78 · 18/05/2011 22:24

A 9 week old baby should not be able to self settle. controlled crying is detrimental to young babies. They need to trust that their caregiver will respond to their needs - they are crying because they need something, even if that something is comfort. If a dummy provides that comfort then go for it. The OP said that she is an attachment parenter and controlled crying definitely does not fit in with that!

CoffeeDodger · 18/05/2011 22:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Sirzy · 18/05/2011 22:35

Controlled crying so young sound cruel to me!

Op my Ds didn't have a dummy until he was ill at 8 weeks and the staff asked if he could have one as it would help - of course i said yes! He is 18 months now and only has it to sleep, he is having an op soon so I am waiting until after then to get rid.

They are only a problem thing if you let them be overused when older IMO.

brettgirl2 · 19/05/2011 06:56

Its just middle class snottyness imo. There is research that shows they cut the risk of cot death. In addition, breathing through the nose is helpful for asthma. As long as they only have them to sleep after about 6 months I dont see what the issue is tbh.

brettgirl2 · 19/05/2011 06:58

Well unless you are up every half hour to replace it!

Original poster

knittakid · 19/05/2011 14:43

yes SVH78, controlled crying is not the route we want to take, and to be honest, his naps are fine, but sometimes he's cranky and I've noticed that it's tiredness, so was wondering how to get him to sleep longer. brettgirl2 why after 6 months?
Sirzy, yes it'd be used only when asleep, as a substitute for my breast... he's 'talking' so much that we wouldn't want to interfere with that.
I might be completely wrong, but at night we're sleeping together, so replacing the dummy would not be more work than what am already doing, during the day... I don't know! anyway, I'm going to buy one and see it it's needed, last night he sleep with his knuckles in his mouth anyway, so might wait and see.

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