18 week old baby - Eye Contact

[Jade1982]

Hi,

I am very concerned about my sons eye contact, he makes relatively good eye contact when on his changing mat, in his pram or his car seat but when sat up right seems to go out of his way to avoid it. Occasionally he looks at my forehead aswell instead of in to my eyes.

I take him to swimming lessons and while all the other babies seem to be looking into their mothers eyes and smiling, my baby is looking around at the lights and everything else but my face. We can also be sat in a room full of people trying to get his attention but he would prefer to look out the window or at pictures on the wall.

I am not concerned about his hearing as he reacts to noise very well. He also reaches to grab things and tracks objects very well so dont think there is a problem with his vision.

I took him to the doctors approximately 5 weeks ago but he just said to give him time as he was still young but so far he doesnt seem to be improving.

Family and friends are trying to convince me his is fine and just really curious but i have a niggling feeling something is not quite right.

Has anybody else had similar experinec and can offer me some advice.

Many Thanks

If you are worried take him to the health visitor for a vision check but he does sound fine. It may be that he's very engaged with the world already and is looking around more that's all - you could take this as a sign of intelligence. :)

I remember having this worry about one of my little boys - it persisted for a really long time. But now he is the most sociable, well adjusted little four year old you could hope to meet. I'm sure it will be fine - if he is making eye contact on the changing mat (which iirc mine wasn't even doing) then that's great. And he is just enjoying looking round at the world and learning about it already.

Eye contact is a big thing isn't it? I think you have a hunch something's up and yes, you might be right but at this age, no professional will be able to spot if there's a problem.

There's every chance he's just nosey but keep an eye on it and if he's the same in a couple of months (say at 6 months to 8 months), ask your GP if you can talk to a speech therapist. They specialise in all aspects of communication and will know what he should be doing at every stage of development.

My dd was the same, I used to worry it was an early sign of autism. She's now a very sociable nearly 4 year old who can make eye contact & hold it, although tbh she doesn't make as much as some others do.

My DD is exactly the same! She will make eye contact when on her mat, in her pram etc., but if I sit her up on my lap it does seem like she's avoiding eye contact, I really try but she just turns her head even more! i personally think it's because she feels safe on my lap and therefore looks around a lot more, and when she's on her mat etc will look at me for reassurance. I think it's just the way some babies are.

Sometimes breaking eye contact can simply be a sign that they are tired, and sitting upright would be more tiring at that age. Also, when sat up, far more of your baby's surroundings (other things in the room) will come into view than when he is lying on his back, so he has a wider choice of things to look at. I found the book 'The Social Baby really useful in helping me to read my DCs cues when they were tiny. The book is full of photographs and examples. HTH.

@Jade1982 it’s been a loooooong time, but any chance of an update ?

Hi @DianaSun

Yes it’s been a very long time, in fact my son is due to turn 12 this week 😊

I’m very happy to say he is doing well. The lack of eye contact did persist until he was approx 6 month old then it seemed to just come. He reached every milestone as expected and has turned into a lovely social boy.

I must add that shortly after this original post I was diagnosed with postpartum depression which seemed to exhibit itself as anxiety. It consumed me and looking back definitely contributed to the excessive worry about the eye contact.

Obviously I am unsure about your situation but if your baby is 6 months or below and seems perfectly fine in every other area I wouldn’t worry too much about the eye contact yet, I’m sure it will come with time.

Hope this helps 😊

@Jade1982 I’m in the same boat with the anxiety! My boy just turned 4months. Same thing as you wrote with the eye contact. Does everything he is supposed to when it comes to age appropriate milestones . The way You wrote your post describes my boy perfectly. You helped me immensely with your answer . Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I wish your boy the happiest of birthdays - lots of health , smiles and success for him!

I know this is an old post but I was wondering if you had an update. My son doesn’t make a lot of eye contact and it’s really concerning me. He is 5.5 months. Thanks!