Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

Original poster

3.5yr DS started to swear - what to do?

9 replies

Ginabraz · 08/05/2011 19:31

My DS1 who is 3.5yrs has just started to swear. Yesterday he was telling DS2 (2yrs) off and then said 'fucking hell' - I was horrified and ignored it. Then today he started saying it again, at first DH and ignored but it got to the point where we had to explain that they are not nice words and he shouldn't use them and if he did we would give his new bike away to another little boy. Obviously he doesn't value the new bike yet as he continues to say it and sometimes with a grin which tells me that he is saying it to get the attention.

Can anyone recommend a tried and tested way how to handle this?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

feedthegoat · 08/05/2011 19:33

ds managed to pick up 'bloody'. I just kept repeating what he said back to him swapping 'bloody' for 'blooming'. Eventually it stuck.

SouthGoingZax · 08/05/2011 19:33

Well now you have threatened to give his bike away you will have to do it. You should NEVER make a threat that you are not prepared to carry through.
I would have a talk with him about how words can upset people and hope that gets through. If not, then I'd say treat as any other misdemeanour - tell the child the consequences if he continues and maintain those boundaries.

whydobirdssuddenlyappear · 08/05/2011 19:34

After gently reminding that they're not nice words, just ignore. Especially if you're aware that he's doing it to get attention. Both mine have done this, and they do get bored with it eventually if you fail to provide the reaction they're after.

whydobirdssuddenlyappear · 08/05/2011 19:35

Although yes, as Zax says, now you've said you'll take his bike away, you need to carry it through. Even if all you do is hide it for a couple of weeks, to be returned when he stops swearing.

Tuggy · 08/05/2011 19:36

Definately take away the bike if you've not done so already. Empty threats are the path to misery.

BeerTricksPotter · 08/05/2011 19:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Rosebud05 · 08/05/2011 19:55

I'm not sure that saying that you'll give his bike (or anything else for that matter) to someone else was the best move...

My dd picked up 'fuck it' when dh locked both sets of cars keys in a double locked car about 5 minutes before we were due to drive to the ferry to go on holiday when she was 3.5 . I said very casually a couple of times that although it's only a word, not everyone wants to hear it and I don't and try not to use it and feel upset with myself when I do.

Then I just ignored it and she stopped it very quickly.

Mummyloveskisses · 08/05/2011 21:04

I agree with everyone about the empty threats. You will have to remove the bike until the swearing stops otherwise you will never gain control.

My DD 3.4yrs says ''bloody mess'' occasionally when the room is untidy after my sister said look at this bloody mess.... I just ignore and its not repeated.

Original poster

Ginabraz · 08/05/2011 22:54

We did take the bike away this afternoon (just hid it). I have no idea where he picked it up. I'm not saying that I don't swear myself because at times I do but his phrase isn't one that I tend to say.

I think we'll just ignore it in future and hope for the best.

OP posts:

Flip