What do I do with a know it all 9yo

[sixthsense]

She is trusted with some responsibilities but loves to go just that one step beyond...

She is very capable of making a cup of tea but is tremendously accident prone and so I will tend to be around whilst she is doing this sort of activity..She really is one of those people that if something is going to happen she will be the one to do it.....I love her sooooo much but she is a "frank spencer" Im afraid

This evening she said could she make a cup of tea...i said certainly, just let me finish drying my hair and you can....2 minutes later I hear a massive crash in the kitchen....3 broken glasses, broken teapot :( and kettle turned over....cue one hysterical DD...."I didnt know that would happen, Im sorry, im sorry" :( :(

What cna I do...I just cant trust her to not ignore my request and just wait...she just seems to always think she knows better and goes and does something I have specifically asked her not to do....almost as if to prove me wrong...

I do have great confidence in her ability, but I also know her limitations...I just dont know how to get through to her that tonight could have been a lot more serious than a few broken glasses etc...I sadi to her "I have to know that I can trust you, that when I ask you not to do something Im not going to find out that you have ignored me"

What can I do to restore my confidence in her and her ability to listen to what I have asked and not go off in the opposite direction...

Aw your poor dd....Do you think she might have given herself enough of a fright with this incident not to try anything like that again? What are the other things she does that you ask her not to - are they dangerous? I can see my own dd being like this in a couple of years (she's 6) - it's hard because you don't want to stifle their independence but also, don't want them to overreach their abilities...

She did get a big shock, but I dont think it was enough to stop her trying it again...we had had similar incidents.

Examples of her ignoring my requests.... wel, I will ask her to leave DS's gekko alone...and then she will come in and tell me that she has just moved him out of his little cave .....poor little gekko gets no peace with her....neither do the hamsters...I swear that one day they will be wearing barbie clothes!!!!

I ask her not to cut the veg up until Im ready to put it in the pot to cook (this is my way of delaying until I can give her my attention)...Im happy for her to help with preparing meals but cutting veg does need supervision yet she will try and ignore this and hack away!!!

Ironing!!!!! that is a big no no...we have had various incidents with the iron....and it is an absolute no go area atm....simple because her attentino span when ironing is about 2 seconds and if she doesnt run over her hand she is in danger of putting holes in stuff...

I know i sound highyl critical but these are just examples of her ignoring my instruction...there are plenty of things she does which are sooooo helpful but she wants to do it all...I live her independent streak but I jst with she would trust that sometimes mum knows best and Im not trying to spoil her fun :(

She is desperate to help isn't she?! She does sound really sweet actually, if a bit accident prone! it does sound like she wants to exert her independence and show she is 'grown - up' with all the helping with household tasks etc she does. Is she very much a 'mummy's girl'? Just wondering if it is all ways of her getting to spend extra time and have extra attention from you?