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How do you get an 11 month old to sleep by himself?!?

7 replies

radbabes · 23/04/2011 22:19

First time poster here, so apologies if this is well trodden ground. Our DS is now 11 months old and generally well behaved in all ways bar one - sleeping at night! Currently, he only seems to fall asleep one of two ways - either feeding to sleep on my breast or being rocked by DH before being put into bed (our bed).

Our worry is that he seems unable to fall asleep by himself - this is made worse if he wakes up at night. The only thing that can send him back to sleep then is a top up feed - he seems unable to put himself back to sleep. We've read a dozen books and tried shushing / patting / cuddly toy etc - everything short of controlled crying it seems, but without success. We were aiming to wean him off the breast by the time he's a year old, so are at our wits end on how to teach him to fall asleep by himself.

What's also worrying us is whether he is feeding a lot more at night - during the day, he eats his solids / snacks well but doesn't seem too keen on water or formula. He will take top up breastfeeds when offered . Any advice much appreciated!

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buffy13 · 23/04/2011 22:22

Hi, I have the same problem with 10 month son, I cuddle him to sleep but this has mainly occurred due to him refusing bottles for past two months and the only way I can get them down him is when he is falling asleep. When he wakes in night I have to cuddle him asleep again or put him in bed with me. I would be really interested in your replies, sorry I don't have any good advice myself :-)

radbabes · 23/04/2011 22:26

Glad to know I'm not the only one with a strong-willed baby! Hopefully there's help out there ...

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Awakealot · 24/04/2011 12:12

Hi - similar problem I'm afraid - not sure what the solution is! Our daughter is just nine months old and generally so "good" that it came as a complete surprise when she started to refuse to go down in her cot. Before she could pull herself up on the bars and sit up, we used to just put her down happily gurgling to herself and leave the room, but now she is absolutely determined not to lie down. We tried the "cruel to be kind" method, and left her to cry for a bit, but when I eventually went in, she was going to sleep sitting up, then falling back down, waking up and crying again, then sitting up and starting the cycle over again. Then we tried holding her down while she went to sleep, which didn't used to take very long, but it still meant that one of us had to be in the room till she went off to slumberland. Lately she has started wriggling so much that it feels wrong to be restraining her to that degree and she has full on tantrums because she (understandably) doesn't want to be held down. Rocking her to sleep in our arms sometimes works, but its very labour intensive (my back isn't in great shape anyway) and she generally wakes up and screams as soon as we lower her into the cot. (I really wish we had brought a drop side cot!) Any suggestions? If only she could understand the words "lie down and go to sleep", but then I suppose she might not obey them anyway.

RufousBartleby · 24/04/2011 12:16

I'm not sure what the answer is either, but I have this problem with my 11 month DS - will be watching with interest.

Mellowfruitfulness · 24/04/2011 17:02

There's another thread, similar to this one here: www.mumsnet.com/Talk/parenting/1194567-Please-help-At-end-of-tether
It might help.

Good luck all.

mewkins · 25/04/2011 21:18

Hiya, we used the baby whisperer technique pick up put down when our dd was about 4 months old. It worked well but sometimes dd would prefer to be left alone if she was really tired. Would really recommend the baby whisperer in general as it is really useful (tho dd has always needed less sleep than it prescribes) hth

AngelDog · 26/04/2011 12:29

Make sure you wait till the 8/9 month - 11 month sleep regression is over before you try. (More info here, here and here.)

Have you read the No-Cry Sleep Solution?

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