DD is such a mummy's girl she's excluding DH - any advice?

[monkeysausage]

DD has just turned two and is currently going through a mummy?s girl phase to the extent that she won?t let DH do anything for her. She wants me to do her bath, her bedtime routine, meals, everything!
Poor DH is feeling left out. He?s a great dad, very hands on and adores DD, but the current situation is getting him down. It?s over every little thing e.g. mummy has to help me put my shoes on, mummy has to sit beside me, mummy has to drive the car etc. If we say to her, for example, Daddy is doing bedtime tonight then she will have a total meltdown.
I?m really not sure what to do with her - indulge her in the hope that it?s a phase she?ll grow out of, or start insisting that she lets DH become more involved. Does anyone have any advice?

Oh, no, don't indulge her, it wouldn't be good for her to feel that she can dictate who can take care of her.

In a year or so, she will want to marry DH and you may end up the fifth wheel for a bit

Maybe he could take her out on his own for a bit, maybe take a picnic and some dollies to the park, or see some animals at a local farm, it will give you a break and your hubby some one on one time with his little princess which might help

It really is a phase and it will pass, but until it does then dh needs to make time to do some daddy and daughter stuff.

My dd was the same at that age and now 6 she is still a Mummys girl but adores her daddy too.

i just read a bit in Playful Parenting about this situation. The author Lawrence Cohen suggests that you need to be the bridge that helps DH reconnect with your DD. So you need to do things like instigating group hugs, and involving DH in games then pointing out to DD how much fun daddy is. He said that often the DC really wants to spend time with the other parent but doesn't know how to reconnect so acts as if they don't. And Dh needs to persist but in a very playful way not a "YOU WILL PLAY WITH ME" type way. Telling her off won't help according to the book. Don't know if it works but it sounded good when i read it on the train this evening.

DD was like this at a similar age. I posted about it on here at the time I think. The general consensus was to arrange for DD and DH to spend more time together when I wasn't around.

DH started taking DD swimming every Saturday morning, and spent Thurs morning with her when I was at work. Things improved massively after this but she does still tend to favour me over DH especially when upset or ill.

DD used to be like this, then I started going to a pregancy yoga class every Saturday morning, leaving her & DH to play alone. I get pretty much ignored for the rest of the day now & daddy has to do everything which is very sweet

I told DH the other day that after I've had the baby I'm still going to leave him & DD to do their own thing on a Saturday morning as it's so nice for them to have some proper time together.

What monkoray said seems to make alot of sense

I also agree - some time alone together can work wonders. Perhaps start with the daytime - out to the park, you go shopping etc etc & work up to going out as bedtime happens so there is no choice.

DH & I have a strict daily rotation on bedtime (apart form when Man City are playing on a DH evening ;) ), children are creatures of habit - if they get used to something happening ie Mummy puts me to bed they will want it to always be that way. They can & will easily adapt sometimes you just need to force the issue.

Thanks for all the replies. Arranging for them to have some time together on a regular basis makes a lot of sense. I've just been thinking that any time DH has minded her on his own, say when I've had a night out, they've has a great time and she's been really sweet and well behaved for him. I'm liking this solution, more me time...Yay!!!

It's v common, all my dds went through this and still show signs of wanting me more than dh with certain things.

Personally I would let her have the meltdown. Decide between you and dh who is doing what on that particular night and then stick to it! She'll soon get the message that she has 2 parents who share her care. Don't let her choose or dictate who does what.