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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

How do you explain that they aren't invited to a party without upsetting them?

6 replies

Lucky13 · 09/04/2011 11:46

Not sure if this is the best place for this, but can anyone help me explain to DD (3) why she hasn't been invited to a party? DD can hear the party going on and is now in tears as she doesn't know why she can't go. I'm not sure how to tactfully tell her that she isn't invited! I can't think of a good reason to tell her!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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rainbowinthesky · 09/04/2011 11:48

Err, why can't you tell her she isnt invited? Or are they all her friends?

thumbwitch · 09/04/2011 11:48

whose party is it? why does she think she should be there?

Original poster

Lucky13 · 09/04/2011 11:51

yes they are her friends.

OP posts:

legobuilder · 10/04/2011 21:22

just tell her not everyone can go because rooms aren't big enough/ it's too expensive! we all have to choose who to invite, and maybe she'll get invited next time. have a teddy bears party with your own music and make a cake or something for the bears!

youngjoly · 11/04/2011 21:02

I just tell my DDs that their mummys just do not have enough pennies to pay for all their friends to go.

As they get older, and understand more, My eldest DD knows now that children have a set list of numbers (as does she - maximum of half the children in the class), and she knows that if X is not on the list its not because she doesn't like them, but just because she plays with other children more. Somehow, even at 7 she seems to buy the idea that if X had had another 1/2 invites, then she probably would have got one!

Thankfully, she has always been invited to parties from the girls she plays with most. Its the girls she does not play with very often that she tends not to get an invite from, but then she realises that it is because she doesn't play with them much, and they've probably just invited the friends they play with more.

DD 2 (age 4) knows that mummies have budgets and they can't invite all their friends, X still likes them, but that she can't expect to go to every party as mummies can't afford to invite every child.

It works for us.

SkinittingFluffyBunnyBonnets · 12/04/2011 11:05

I would tell her that the party is only for X childs family...Mummy's and Daddys and cousins....and that there is no room for friends. And then take her to the park!

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