4YO, late talker, not interested in socializing. Unusual? Tips?

[OliveHats]

Our son will be four in a few weeks. Although he has great vocab, diction and pronunciation, this came later than normal, and now he's not very interested in conversations, particularly with other children. He also doesn't ask as many questions as other children.

He's comfortable in very small, familiar social groups (like nursery), and likes to play with family and some other adults, but is very disinterested in socialising with other children. At parties, he stands out clearly as he won't join in with most group games and doesn't interact with other kids.

He's been assessed as unlikely for autism, and has a speech assessment due, but we're anxious, as he'll be starting school in September. We worry he won't make friends and that it will affect him academically.How unusual is this? And any suggestions to accelerate his development?

My dd was just like this at preschool and I worried, like you, but once she started lower school she just blossomed and grew a lot more confident - she will never be the showoff in the room but everyone's different! I'd say, encourage playdates with 1-2 friends, and at home do role playing with him to encourage turn taking, conversation and question asking. :)

www.hanen.org - try their book "Talkability", available cheaper from Winslow.

my son doesn't have autism but had big lags with social skills and it really helped me break these down into the little things he had to practice (and want to practice)

Many thanks!
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My ds1 was very similar - he really didnt speak until he was 4 .......now? hes 17 the life and soul and off to uni in sept to study Law!!.

(and he never shuts up).

We always say the time he didnt speak he was absorbing everything.

My ds2 was slow to speak and even when he did was not keen to speak to anyone outwith the immediate family. If I invited friends to play he hid in the kitchen and came out when they had gone. He was very quiet in his first few years at school although he made sone friends and would play with them at school and home. He always liked school and just gradually became more confident.

At a recent parent appointment the teacher said "C has a real skill at giving class talks, he has such a sense of humour and makes everyone laugh." I was gobsmacked! He is still quiet compared to his brothers but not shy.

nice story Jubilee.