How can I stop 19 month old hitting me?

[CrankyFrankyMum]

I am becoming increasing frustrated with my 19 month old DD2 who I cannot get to stop hitting me. She has always been very determined and willfull, sometimes outright naughty but, ironically, can be so loving and empathetic.

The trouble is that recently she has taken to hitting out at me if I am trying to get her to do something she doesn't want to. ie strapping her into her buggy, taking away a spoon she is hitting everything with. I start but telling her firmly "no, that hurts Mummy", then when she persists I will hold her wrists and look into her eyes and tell her again, "no, that hurts". She just laughs at me!

I would appreciate any ideas as to what I can do. My DD1 never really behaved in this way and when she did she was old enough that I could tell her that if she did it again certain treats (bedtime story, Cbeebies) would be taken away but my DD2 is too young to understand this.

Ds was a smacker, I used to say no then take his hand and use it to stroke my arm while saying kind touch, gentle touch

and whenever he touched me or his sister nicely praised him

And also got his sister (elder by 2 years) to model good touching

Finally where he was completely smackadelic, put him alone in his cot for 1 min, then when I took him out said no hitting, kind touches

he is 22 months now and much much better (but not perfect!)

What your DD is old enough to understand is that all attention will be withdrawn if she smacks.

Every time she does it, put her down and walk away from her after saying "no, that hurts". Then when she's being lovely, praise her to the heavens. The less attention the poor behaviour gets, the less likely she is to do it. The more positive she gets, then you'll start getting more of the desired behaviour.

Mine did this too. They do grow out of it. In the meantime, yes, just keep saying no and give no attention. Just a phase some go through I'm afraid but it does pass.

We use the naughty step with our 18 month old DS if he hits. If its me or my DH we usually give a warning first but if he hits another child he gets no warning just straight to the step - or spot if at someone else's house.
I don't do the whole Super Nanny thing of putting him back 100 times but i do put him back three or four times if he gets up just to make the point (but often he doesn't get up because he realises he's done something wrong and needs to sit it out for one minute).
It has dramatically reduced his hitting (or maybe its just coincidence and he he just grew out of it)

Thuis does seem to be the time when the smacking starts my DS 18 month does it to me

I think hitting at this age is completely normal. I just say "Be gentle with you hands" or "We don't hit" and move on with the situation.

At this age, lashing out is all they've got to communicate with. They get easily frustrated and don't have the skills to overcome it with violence.

Well thanks everyone for the reassurance and suggestions. I guess I know she will grow out of it - she will have to because I won't tolerate it in an older child who should know better. The naughty step idea was one I was condsidering so thanks for letting me know it was a positive move for you monkoray.