advice please re body curiosity

[ladynoo]

1st post so forgive the amateur! I'd simply like to know the best, most sensitive way of dealing with my son's natural body curiosity.

His cousin slept over recently & I caught them playing games which consisted of looking at each others bits & bit of touching. They are both 4.All instigated by cousin who has an older brother.

Body curiosity is v natural but boundaries need to be drawn. I'm unsure as to how to do this tho! I don't want them to feel ashamed, disgusting or develop issues about it. My friend says she just tells them not to cos it's 'rude' but that may make him feel bad. My sis not sure how to handle it either! How do I word it to my DS??
TIA

I think the important lesson isn't that bodies are "rude" but that they are yours and it's up to you to decide if you are happy to look/show/touch. And that if anyone makes you feel uncomfortable then it's always ok to say no, make a fuss, tell an adult, etc.

Oh and that lots of people don't like to see other people's "private" bits, so not to do it in public.

Agree. I would say you can talk about your willy/bum etc but only if you want to but lets not show each other or touch each others because it's just for you, or something like that. And other people might not like to see it. And agree about drumming it in right now that only he is allowed to say who can look at it/touch it etc.

Thanks to you both for your thoughts on this. Think I was worrying too much about how to stop my son's body curiosity rather than accept it and have him explore in a safe way. I've had a little chat with him and told him if he ever feels uncomfortable, he must tell me but its perfectly normal to be interested in bodies. He said 'yes, I'm interested in bums and willies and eyes' :)

Hi - I had similar recently with my 3yo son and a 4yo girl friend who he had over to play - they kept disappearing upstairs and she'd take off her clothes and ask DS to touch her bum! I asked why he did and he said, because I wanted to ;-) So I agree with the othes above - I told him that willies and bums are private; you don't touch other people's and only touch your own in private...

Hi ladynoo, we have had the same thing here - same age too. It seems to have lessened a bit and my son seems to be the instigator (the surious one). I've took been internally absolutely mortified but externally always tried to laugh it off but have done the same as jellybean. It seems to be a phase that's finally running it's course and he only does it rarely now. Have spoken to wuite a few people about it with older kids and they all seem to go trhough it. Hope you feel better!

So glad to read this as something similar has happened with my ds and it's good to know it's all a normal thing so to speak.
I do remind him that they are private and also you don't touch anyone elses and nobody touches yours (apart from him which is perfectly ok to do).