emotional outbursts in 9 yr old ds - stress or his age ?? please help

[labradoodleandproud]

My 9 yr old is a typical boy, loves sport and always done well at school.

Twice this week he has got really distressed at bed time and cried for ages and ranted about school / his teacher / he is not good enough / his writing is untidy / he missed playtime etc etc etc.

It has been really distressing and I am just not sure where it has all come from as is so unlike him.

Could it be stress or is it his age. Tonight he started cryig about the Tsunami and how god is horrible for letting bad things happen (we are not religous at all) after his long rant about school.

I did wonder if he is just becoming aware of all the horrible things that can happen and that + school pressure is all a bit much. I cannot understand though as he was fine and said school was fun today and then this all came out jsut after he went up to bed. He has no behaviour issues at all.

Can any one shed some light as it is horrible to see him so distressed and dh and I are at a complete loss as to what to do about it. We have parents eve coming up soon and last term he got a glowing report (dh and I are not pushy parents btw)

Your poor boy sounds like he is frightened after seeing the terrible images from Japan. This probably surfaces at bedtime because he is winding down and his mind has a bit more space to think.

I remember being incredibly frightened as a child, after watching "Where the Wind Blows". I was a bit older than your son but it had a long lasting effect on me and I became quite depressed. I wish my Mum had noticed like you have. I wish she had talked to me and let me know that some things were constant and that the danger wasn't immediate.

I think you're right about him becoming more aware. I also think he's lucky to have such a lovely Mum .

thanks shockers what a lovely thing to say.

Dh is going to have a talk with him tomorrow and see what he says during the day before he gets all in a state and I have some time off over easter hols and will make a huge effort to spend some 'quality time' with him to see if it helps.

I feel so sorry for him as life is stressful sometimes but he is so young to be feeling it

anyone ?

I have the same problem with a younger child. he just happens to be very aware about the consequences of things. The coverage on the news these days is so detailed and broken down it is easier for them to access. It is possible the rant from school came from a one off event where he was easily distracted and didnt complete the work to the level and standard that he was expected too and was kept in for it and told that it was because the work wasnt good enough. different children react to this differently. My ds doesnt give shit. His best friend was kept in once due to messing about with my ds and came out of school in floods of tears.

It is important to try to understand but the school thing could also be a generally class telling off for not putting in enough effort. But previous posters are right, i remember becoming far more aware of what was going on in the world at this age, although having much younger siblings meant that i had less exposure. But i do remember being in floods of tears over orphens from the east when that broke and i wasnt that old.

the school thing you can ask about at parents evening but i think it is possibly more then one thing. A bad day at school and an increase in awareness of events leading to the discovery we dont all life for forever. a concept that is comforting to children and distressing for them to lose.

Agree with previous poster who said that he is lucky that you are trying to figure out what he is upset about and comfort him. keep talking to him.

thanks - he seems fine today and dh is 'having a chat' with him on their way out in the car.

I just hope it is a passing phase and he will be ok.

He asked me what was going on in Lybia as it had not been on the news so we will try to keep him away from the news for awhile too