mums of sprightly kids...support

[CHST]

How do you cope?
I have 2 ds 2 1/2 years age gap. The eldest is a LOT of work...so much energy, never stops, very strong willed. He does not listen to me a lot of the time. The younger has just hit 2 and tantrum mode. On their own, both boys are actually not bad but together eek! Big sibling rivalry. Older one is in the face of younger one all the time, snatches, pushes, blocks path of younger just so he cries. Younger has started fighting back as well. I think a lot of people pity me, especially as I got a sympathetic poor you when I replied that ds2 does not nap anymore. I feel tired all the time, told I look tired. Does it get any better....like ever? I envy mums of lovely smiling girls that do as they are told and sit still on laps whilst my two run riot.
Who can sympathise?

Same here. 2.5 year gap and fight like UFC fighters and their girls. My 2 youngest brothers were a 2.5 yr gap and fought like hell. Theres 4 of us and the rest of us didnt. Proff Winston done a study and apparently the 2.5 gap is the worst

great lmao! I think it is a bad age gap as well. Isn't hindsight a wonderful thing!!!!

Ive got a 2 year old who copies off them and fights with the both of them..even better lol

confirmed my suspicions that a number three is a no go!!!!

we were talking about a similar thing at the school the other day. A few of us have a troup of the same sex siblings. I am the only one with the girls. One of the mams has 4 boys and has started looking after her niece. She said i dont know how you cope with the constant screeching and chatter and girls always want to be amused. It made me laugh as sometimes its like a verbal assault when mine start. My mam has me and 3 boys and said whe would rather have another 3 boys than me when i was little.

feeling for you. my DS 3.7 is exactly same but thank god he still does nap!

having a screamy DD 9month doesnt help but i am glad she wasn't a he for your reason

not all DDs are quiet though!

ps my mum always prefers having DS as she says he's more fun than difficult girls

no 3? not for me

i try and remb that for however much he drives us bonkers, he is so loving and funny, sure yours are too

yeah they are both incredibly loving when they want to be...I do want to pull my hair out some days though! I'm sort of hoping at some point they will mellow! We take ds1 to gymnastics with the plan of getting rid of his energy...he now makes gymnastic circuits round the blooming house and climbs up high to jump down...heart stopping!! I am one of 4 girls and there certainly was a lot of bitchiness growing up especially round the teens

please dont say that, i might just make it through childhood

My eldest is 3, youngest 1, 23 month gap and DS1 is just the same as yours OP.
A (childless) friend said today 'isn't he a bit old for the terrible twos?!'.
She wasn't being mean but he had HUGE hissy fits when he doesn't get his own way, screaming, shouting, hystericaly crying, the works. He's also really mean to poor DS2. I am waiting for DS2 to walk which I hope will even things out a bit for him!
He can be horrible to other kids too which is SO upsetting. He seems only to relate well to adults or older children, particularly girls. (I think because his cousins are older girls?).
My Mum looks aghast at me and DS1 quite a lot (I'm one of 3 girls) and sometimes I think I am failing miserably at bringing a nice boy up.

What a great thread to find after a week of feeling like I am coping really badly and doubting all of my parenting skills! I too have a DS 3.7, a very lively, noisy one! And an 11 month old DD. DS is very challenging at the moment, just like you blondiep, he is often horrid to DD and other little ones. I know it is pure jealous rage, and I do try and stay calm and encourage good behaviour. Teatime is the worst, when we're all tired and he becomes a wild thing! I do shout much more than I should and have even given him a wallop on his behind. How incredibly bad did that make me feel! He didn't seem that bothered though. I just keep telling myself it will pass, and looking forward to wine o'clock!

Good luck everyone, it's tough.

good luck with it passing lol mine are 9.4 and 6.11 and there still at it. Been at it all day long. A hair tug here, a sly dig there, theatrical screaming and as for the little one shes motormouth

Fifi - nooooooooooooooooooooo! Don't say such things!

I'm hiding upstairs from my two 'lively' DDs. 6 Year age gap so I thought it might be easier but OMG I could throttle the two of them right now. DD1 has come upstairs to her room so I might go back down. Like you OP, they are not too bad on their own but together they are v disobedient, in each other's faces all the time. DD2(3) is very handy with her fists which doesn't help, hoping this is just a phase but its been going on for about 18 months and I'm at the end of my tether right now.

Feel for you

Oh my, oh my I thought it was just my two.

DD aged 6 and DS aged 3. They do not stop, talking, fighting, laughing, hitting, and generally driving me to distraction.

Neither of mine have ever been the sort of children who sit in a pushchair for very long to enable me to walk around a shop and yet I see this SOOOO often. They are never quiet and often fight each other for attention as both of very verbal.

The only time they are quiet is if they are unwell. In fact this is how I know they are ill as they are silent!

Chumble, I totally relate to what you're saying. I always look in wonder and envy at those mothers lingering along the shelves in shops while their DC sit still in a pushchair. And I also can always tell when my DD1 (4) is unwell because she SITS STILL!
Can we tell ourselves they will be achievers when they grow up? Or something?!!

i was looking round george in asda the other day. I have to take the buggy for when she gets tired but she never hardly sits in it. Anyways she went quite and she was blowing her nose on some random womans skirt which she thought was on the rail. So pleased the woman didnt notice

3 year age gap works wonders for me and a lot of other mothers I know. I have a dd, then a ds. Others 2 dds. Dd dotes on ds who in turn tries to keep up with her. They have their moments of rivalry but are mostly partners in crime.

They share the same bed. I wonder if that helps.

I think it is easier if the oldest is a girl, rather than a boy.

My DDs are just under a year apart, currently 3 and 4 years. They are really really close, but they also can be so mean to each other, fighting, DD1 mentally pushing DD2 so far that DD2 retaliates by pushing or hitting, and then DD1 start screaming like a baby! It drives me nuts!

I agree blueshoes, my friends who have similar gaps to mine have found if the eldest is a girl then there are far fewer problems.
I don't know about two girls tho.

My brother and I are only 20 months apart and now that I'm a parent I wonder why my Mum never packed her bags!

We were very close, but fought like cat & dog sometimes and then would be sitting cuddling on the sofa ten minutes later whilst my Mum was tearing her hair out.

We were both 'lively' but only he is a high achiever. I am still 'lively' tho' DH thinks Im worse than DDs some days. It's a constant battle to get a word in in our house.

why is it though that I never seem to see these sprightly kids around my neighbourhood? It is just my two. In the library at Christmas, my eldest had a tantrum on the floor for some pathetic reason while an old lady tutted at him (to try and help me out by getting him to stop so she said) and while I was dealing with him and trying to get him to stop it, my youngest decides to walk into the christmas tree and knock it over lights fly across the library floor, me all red trying to scoop them up and put the tree back together again and the baubles back on. Mortifying

oh and they never sit still at the library. Eldest gets all the audio cds and opens them all up to count them, youngest runs around the table and pulls books off the shelf. Eldest jumps from beanbag to beanbag. I dread to think what the staff think!