Severe separation anxiety with 7 month old

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Hi all

Sorry about this long post, but I'm so worried I just want to pour my heart out! My baby has been showing a lot of anxiety since he was 5 months or so. He is now 8 months and it is only getting worse!

He howls if anyone other than Mum and Dad pick him up. He used to go to his gran easily, but now seeing her after a month. Will play with her, laugh and coo, from my arms. The moment she tries to pick him he howls!

I am super-worried because I need to sart working in a couple of months and soon going to be getting a nanny for him. Will nannies accept this sort of behaviour, I'm worried she'll quit in a week. And how can I leave my little baby so scared and miserable with anyone??

I had also put him in nursery for a bit where he did settle eventually but it took him 3 long weeks to do so. Nursery staff even told me at one point they were considering telling me he may not yet be ready because he used to cry much more than other babies, though he suddenly adjusted one fine day!

Did anyone have a super-clingy baby this age and go back to work leaving them behind? Please let me know, I'm so worried!

Yes, I went back to work part time in September, my DS goes to a childminder and the first few weeks were very tough as he howled as I handed him over, and then cried again when seeing me when I came to pick him up. But she told me that he didn't cry for that long after I left and it was a bit of a show. He cried less and less and after about a month stopped crying completely. Last week when I went to pick him up he cried because he was having such a good time he didn't want to leave!

His nan looks after him once a week and he still cries a bit (but really, hardly at all these days) when he sees her at the door, because once a week isn't enough to really get used to being left with her. It's been all about him settling into the routine and getting used to it.

It's tough but totally normal. The No-Cry Separation Anxiety Solution by Elizabeth Pantley has some good ideas. No tips from experience though as my 14 m.o. still won't be left with anyone other than me or DH. He wouldn't 'socialise' with anyone from my arms at 8 months though - he'd shriek as soon as anyone tried to talk to him. Now he's quite chatty once with other people as long as DH or I am there.

My dd went through this around that age and then again at about 17 months, its very tough and can drain you emotionally, but she grew out of it and then started to enjoy going places without me. But I have just posted on same topic that she is now 4yrs and it seems to have started all over again, this time now she can speak, she crys saying she only wants mummy - you just have to stay strong - it is normal. With regards to a nanny not putting up with it, they should be used to it. good luck x

All, thank you so much! I'm not sadistic but it gives me some comfort to hear this is normal and he will hopefully outgrow it!
Can I ask whether you still did leave your babies alone with nannies, or did you wait till they outgrew this stage completely? I don't want to make it worse by forcing him to be with a nanny (but I don't have much choice)!

My 24 week old is also just starting to cry if I go out of the room or even if I start walking away from her. She even cries if I'm behind her where she can't see me, even when I'm talking to her and trying to reassure her that I'm still there. She's Ok with strangers in that she doesn't cry when they approach but she wont smile at them unless they've been talking to me for quite a while and she then looks at me first to see if it's alright before she will smile. I'll be interested to see if anyone on here has any tips about the crying when put down thing. Even if I turn away from her to pick something up off the floor that she has dropped she starts to cry and my going to the loo on my own or going to put the kettle on without her is now impossible without tears!
Hope she grows out of it really fast, 'cos I find it extremely wearing and stressful - she was such a happy baby till now so it's a shame this separation anxiety thing has started. I was just starting to really enjoy every moment with her!