Baby Whisperer fans...

[islandbaby]

Hello

so... it seemed a nice E.A.S.Y idea. But I have a problem.

The little man (11wks) feeds pretty much every 3 hours on the dot. Usually we wake up, feed, then play/activity for about an hour. He'll get grumpy and start fussing for sleep about an hour and a half/two hours after waking, then sleep for about an hour. It's a nice 3 hourly eat-activity-sleep cycle.

USUALLY.

But, what happens when he decides he only wants to play for half an hour before getting sleepy, then only sleeps for 20 minutes. This leaves us only 2 hours since his last feed, so he's not hungry. But he's awake, so... it's play time again! But he's going to want feeding before sleeping again, so then we're onto Play-eat-sleep ('You' time... hahaha) and we're all out of whack.

Would you guys just hold out on the feeding and put them to bed to get back into the wake-feed-play-sleep pattern?

Also, he's so not up for the self-settling thing (all my fault apparently for cuddling him to sleep when he was teeny tiny). Is that just perseverence?

Thanks!

I tend to use the eat, activity, sleep thing as a very loose routine, take it with a pinch of salt and realise there will be times when my DS is hungrier, sleepier or more playful than others. Babies aren't little robots after all

Growth spurts and illness will always mess with routine, however loose or rigid. You could perhaps try to get him to sleep for longer? Depends whether he seems refreshed or grumpy when he wakes up? If my DS doesn't have at least 3 hours of napping during the day i know i'm in for trouble, but only you know your baby's needs and the older he gets the more these will change but the more 'in tune' with him you'll be. I certainly wouldn't advise holding off a baby from food or putting them down when they're likely to become hungry any time soon and wake up anyway.

You can probably tell i'm not a huge fan of these routiney things, although they undoubtedly have their place. My advice is use it as a guide rather than the law - it'll mean that both you and your LO are happier in the long run.

Incidentally, i also don't agree that it's your fault your DS can't self settle. Some are naturally better than others at this - it all depends on how the cards fall! My DS (13.5 weeks) was rocked, cuddled, paced, co-slept, baby slinged, driven etc etc when he was teeny tiny and he self settles brilliantly now but i guess i'm lucky! The Baby Whisperer is right though - it's an acquired skill so perhaps he'll get better the better you are at catching him and putting him down during his 'window'....

Thanks.

Yes, we are not very routiney people in my household, so no gina ford-style living for us. The Baby Whisperer 'routine' just sort of helped get my head around what to expect when, whereas before I was really confused about what he was crying for and when.

Cool. Thanks.

I used to find lo was always hungry when he woke up and then I'd want to feed him before naps so he wasn't waking through hunger (he was a very hungry baby). So ours used to go E A E S Y.....however I did find once lo was crawling/walking he'd tire himself out a lot more and drop straight to sleep in the pushchair or wherever we were. By the time he was 1 he'd eat at regular intervals, and sleep for regular naps-it gets a lot easier and the first few months really do fly by so just stick with it for now!

Hi island. I used EASY with DD and had the same problem as she used to get sleepy really soon after eating then not sleep long enough until the next feed.

For us it was mostly a case of getting her used to getting herself back off to sleep when she woke (she was like clockwork with the 45 min sleep cycles) and after a few months she was able to do this and would sleep 1.5-2hrs each time rather than the 45 mins she would manage at first.

The hardest part for us when she was young (right up to almost 6 months) was keeping her awake after getting up - especially first waking of the day at 7am as she was looking like she wanted to go back to bed by 7.45am and it took a lot of effort to get her to stay awake longer.

It all paid off though as she is a fantastic sleeper now, and at 18 months is on 1 nap a day of about 2-3hrs, plus 12-13hrs at night.

I would definitely try tackling the length of the sleep if I were you and not get your DS up after the 20 mins, just give him reassurance and encourage them to go back to sleep.

Good Luck.

To get him to settle on his own, slow down a bit and talk to him to let him know what you're doing. Tell him you're going to put him in his crib as he gets the 7 mile stare. Lower him into it to a count of 3. Leave your hands on him for a count of 3, move one then the other (again to a count of 3). Stay by the side of the crib for 3. Then as the weeks go by he will get better at self settling.

And don't worry you can't spoil a baby with too many cuddles but you will have a settled baby who knows he's loved! 11 weeks is still VERY young, enjoy those snuggles now as before you know it you'll have a crawling more independent little man!

We used baby whisperer with 13 month old DD. We had almost exactly the same sleep issue - 25 min power naps (barely enough time for a cuppa and to get a load of washing on, let alone sleep yourself!) though the day... The pay off was that she slept well through the night and has continued to do so as she's got older. And at 11 months suddenly started having a longer sleep at lunchtime.

For what it's worth, the baby whisperer principles (SLOW down etc) have given us a settled happy child and a good framework to work from. But we don't follow everything she said to the letter or in the order she said - our DD was VERY refluxy so her "activity" would have been being winded - not very stimulating LOL!

I've got an 11-week-old DD. I do A-E-A-S-Y now. When she wakes, it's nappy change and then in the bouncer so she can watch me. Or we "talk" to each other. She will last maybe 40 minutes before wanted to feed. After feed, it's burp time, little play, cuddle and a lullaby. Then sleep.

But at 0830 she only sleeps 50 minutes, but for the 1430 sleep, she sleeps two or two and a half hours.