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Behaviour/development

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Temper/frustration management in a 3.9yo

1 reply

Aliway · 17/02/2011 17:56

Have had a harrowing day. This morning after taking ds to his bedroom to calm down. He threw a huge tantrum in his room and threw bricks around, he smashed one of the double glazed windows. He was very sorry after woods, said sorry and that ' shouldn't worry as daddy can fix it...'. Some time ago he again threw things (books) around his room and badly damaged the door.
I need to use time out to calm down as it gives me time to have break and not shout at him,and give him the chance to well I suppose, reflect.

He attends nursery and last week he had one of these outbursts at nursery where he launched himself at a 2 year old girl, they were understandably concerned and then also mentioned that he tends to shout when he is speaking and is not keen on copying phonic sounds such as 'k' and mma etc... He tends to growl a lot like a cheetah, tiger, bear this usually proceeds some sort of out burst. Does any one have any helpful approaches that have been beneficial and effective. Of note he still needs a daytime sleep most days for about an hour and a half, when he is not cross he is thoughtful, chatty, full of energy. Sorry for the long post, thanking in advance for anyone's input

OP posts:
shivster1980 · 17/02/2011 22:14

Didn't want to read and run. Not an expert but my DS who is now 4.9 has shown similiar behaviours although not the destructiveness which must be very distressing.

The growling has been an issue here, as one of my DS's difficulties is being unable to articulate his emotions this was a big issue a year ago or so.

Does your DS's growl come before a meltdown? I have found it helpful to articulate his feelings for him. "I can see you are feeling cross about that what can we do to help?" type of thing.

It might also be worth looking into safe-holding techniques maybe, if your son is destructive in time out. Or maybe a safe area where he can sit for time out (although this is only useful if you are calm when holding - I haven't managed it). Part of a hall or landing where he has nothing to damage.

Is your health visitor useful?

I can only speak from my experience so I don't know if its any use.

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