Very Worried about DD1 who is 4 yo and her relationship with food.
DD1 is a sweet, thoughtful and sensitive child. She is polite and caring and seems to many to be confident but she is reserved and not assertive. She is considerate to others beyond her 4 years but is often sad when other 4 yo's are not considerate to her. She has a sister, DD2, who is a normal, funny, unreserved 2 1/2yo and they play well together.
DD1 emotionally eats, or comfort eats, especially if she's feeling unsure/ nervous.
If food isn't limited, ie a table of food at a party she will eat cake after cake and not stop. Even when she's had a good lunch and plenty of party food already. I'll try to persuade her to join in with the party and I'll hold her hand if she's nervous. Sometimes I have to threaten to leave the party.
I've often seen her cram a huge handful of raisins into her mouth at pick up time from pre-school (when spare fruit is brought out) and then grab another handful (with her back turned so she thinks I can't see). She is doing well at pre-school and enjoys it.
If someone else has a snack at pick-up time she will follow them with hungry eyes and beg bits of food.
We can have a lovely meal with friends, or out at her favourite restaurant, and ten minutes later, when we get home, she'll say she's hungry and "needs" a snack.
She would eat at any time and eat until she bursts. She asks for snacks constantly.
Yesterday at a party I saw her falter when she wanted to play with friends but didn't have the confidence to join in and she turned and came to me to say she was so hungry and wanted more cake.
I tried to divert her by asking if she wanted to play with her friends and I'd help her but she was already "gone".
After the party was a raffle with a huge cookie as a prize for one person. DD1 wrestled her way to the winner of the cookie (a parent she didn't know) and pleaded for a piece. Even though there was NO WAY she could possibly have been physically hungry. Then someone else won a box of chocolates and she was onto him as well. I was shocked and so sad the my DD "needs" to do this.
If we visit a friend who DD1 knows has a biscuit box she will demand a biscuit as soon as we enter. The demand another.
I am trying to divert her with cuddles and giggles and praise for good behaviour and affection but she seems to have some overwhelming "need" to stuff food down whenever she can.
We do have a good fresh balanced diet at home and occasionally we'll do some fun baking together. DD1 is a very good egg-cracker!
I am so sad to see my beautiful DD1 stuffing sweet food into her mouth like she can't get it in fast enough. I feel like I'm watching an eating disorder developing in front of my eyes. I am trying to increase her confidence in other ways and boost her self esteem. I wonder if some emotional need in her is not being met. What should I do? 