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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

getting rid of dummy!

12 replies

ballinderrymum · 11/02/2011 19:47

hi does anyone have any advice on how to get rid of 4 year old DDs dummy? DD has it at bed time only but she wakens if she loses it during the night. i am stressing about it as last christmas (DD coming 3 then) santa was going to take it and she cried on christmas eve night saying she didn't want santa to come, so we gave in this year she remembered the ordeal saying she didn't want santa to take it even though we hadn't mentioned it. i have heard about dummy fairies but i really think that she wouldn't let us leave it out for her/him. we have told her that the fairy gives the dummies to babies that don't have dummies and she likes the sound of that (and the present) but i don't want a repeat of christmas eve 2009!

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Coffeebeans · 11/02/2011 20:30

I've got no advice, sorry, but i will be watching this thread. My gp gave me a right telling off the other day because my 9mo had is dummy in his mouth. Told me to start weaning him off it now because he's got a rash & it will make his teeth wonky when they come through. I felt really bad afterwards!

Coffeebeans · 11/02/2011 20:30

couldtryharder · 11/02/2011 20:38

Give your GP a slap coffee!!!! How very f*cking rude of him/her. Mine had a dummy til just over 3 and there is nothing wrong with her! Wonky teath my arse! OP, we were so worried about our DD giving hers up as she LOVED hers and also woke up when it fell out at night (tedious). But she used to chew them and one they had a hole in I'd have to throw them as I though they were dangerous and unhygenic (more than usual). So we explained that I wasn't going to buy any more and when she'd gone through the last one, that was it. There were a few tears, but it didn't last long. She'll get there, fret not. And Coffee, get a new GP!

milkyway2007 · 11/02/2011 20:43

Well I remember when I was about 3, my Mum kept telling me for a few days that I was a big girl, and that I didnt need a bottle anymore (I never sucked a dummy, but same principle).

So a couple of days later, she gave me a pair of small scissors and told me to cut up the teat of one the bottle as its "fun". So I did it - and it was indeed very fun!

Couple of days later, again she asked me to do the same thing with the next bottle. Then again with the final bottle. She told me that I had no bottles left now, and because I cut them all up, big girls dont need bottles. I never cried or asked for a bottle again.

Cutting the teats made me feel like I was doing something special and it was like closure for me.
Thats how my Mum got me off the bottles, and I will do the same with my daughter.
Wow, I have pretty good memory for a 27 yr old!

HattiFattner · 11/02/2011 20:45

i think the thought/dread of them giving up the dummy is worse than the reality. they grizzle for a day or two, but then its done.

bumbums · 11/02/2011 20:53

My DS was just over 3 I think when the dummy fairy came. He'd seen this amazing toy that he wanted and so it was agreed that the dummy fairy would bring it in exchange for the dummies. He had a muslin/dummy combo so we let him keep the muslin and just give up the dummy. He never cried for it or asked for it again and was very pleased with his present.
Had some awkward questions about where the dummy fairy lives and how she carries the presents etc, but I managed to bluff my way through it.

Original poster

ballinderrymum · 11/02/2011 20:53

hatti you are right about the dread. i think we are going to do it at the end of this month - on a friday night so that the night of screaming and tears (me ) can be recovered from the following day

OP posts:

HattiFattner · 11/02/2011 21:34

ballinderrymum take her swimming on friday night, then out for a treat -ice cream,burger, pizza, then home later than normal and into bed. She will be so tored that the grizzle wont last long. Next day might be difficult, but again, keep busy all day, put her to bed exhausted.

beware, however, that she might discover her thumb (as two of mine did) and thats more difficult to get rid of!

Coffeebeans · 12/02/2011 09:27

ha ha could try harder, I thought she was a bit harsh. It's a large surgery so I can ask to see another doctor. I've never heard of children getting wonky teeth from a dummy, only thumb sucking.
Milkyway, I like your idea with cutting the teats.
I'm sure i can wait till ds is older.

petitdonkey · 12/02/2011 09:33

CUT IT!! I did this with DD when she was two - I didn't get her to do it though. I just put a small snip in the teat and when she went for her nap she put it in and pulled it out looking puzzled - 'Oh, is it broken?' says I 'never mind'. I then left her for her sleep, no problems. Exactly the same that nigh. She used to have it clipped to her Grobag so I felt that she would naturally wake in the night and feel for it. After three nights I just took it away.

I think that the thing I liked best about doing this was that I never felt like I took away her dummy. Interestingly, about ten days later she found an untampered dummy, put it in her mouth and had already lost the ability to suck it!!

Trina82 · 12/02/2011 17:12

On my DD's 4tho b'day we palnted it in nanny's garden, then went out, when we came home it had grown into a lovely plant (thanks to grandad!), she was fine, we had a meltdown that night and wanted to gi back to nanny's to dig it uo etc but I just laid with her and calmed her down. She did pinch her younger DB's and DS's a few times though!

doittomorrow · 12/02/2011 21:01

We got rid of DS1's dummy when he was about 3.6
We had talked about the dummy fairy on and off for a while and although he was keen on the idea when it came to actually taking the dummies away he got very upset.
In the end we agreed on a toy he wanted from the dummy fairy. I then printed a picture of the toy off the pc and wrote a letter addressed to DS on the back. Basically saying Dear DS1 I am the dummy fairy thank you for leaving me your dummies I will collect them tonight and leave your new toy (photo below) tonight. blah blah. Left the letter on the mat for DS to find.
Dummy fairy came that night. He took a while to settle and woke a few times but never asked for the dummy back.
Not sure if the visual aspect of the photo/letter made a difference but may be worth a go?

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