6 yr old DD acting out? or more serious

[magpumpkin]

My 6 yr DD is on a behaviour diary at school for misbehaving at break/lunchtimes with her BF. This was agreed with both parents, however it seems this monitoring is having a negative effect with my DD. She stated off great but it has slowly snowballed into being quite naughty everyday in class also.

I have a meeting after school today with her teacher but I feel she may be monitored to the extreme and every little misdemeanor is being written down and commented on. Positive reinforecment was meant to improve her behaviour but it seems she is being labelled with 'well I'm being told I'm naughty so I might as well be naughty'. It is really worrying me and I don;t know if there is something more serious they have been keeping from me. Any advise would be appreciated.

I can see where you're coming from and she is very young. To have unacceptable behaviour under the spotlight in this way is unhelpful at best.

The teacher should be observing her, working out what triggers this behaviour and making changes which remove the triggers. She should also be looking for every incident of good behaviour she can see and praising her like mad for them.

If this teacher really wants a behaviour diary I would suggest that they need to put one episode of wanted behaviour in for every episode of unwanted behaviour. That way the picture is not so biased.

Do not accept them saying they don't see any good behaviour because that just means they aren't looking for it.

If she hangs up her coat without being asked. Puts her hand up to answer a question. Tidies a toy away or remembers to wash her hands before lunch they can use it.

I think you need to get them to change this before it develops into a vicious circle (if it hasn't already).

I absolutely agree with above post, this behaviour diary seems to be concentrating on the bad behaviour a bit much.

My little boys reception class has a few children with challenging behaviour at times, but instead of signalling out just those two or three, they have a behaviour "chart" for the whole class, they work up this chart and get rewarded for little things like tidying the toys away when asked, lining up nicely, asking a question etc. At the end of each day those children who have reached the "rainbow" picture get a good behaviour certificate and if they have been really good throughout the week one or two even get a "head teachers award" (certificate) at the Friday assembly. If however at the end of the day children are on a "storm cloud" picture (because of repeated unacceptable behaviour)a note to the parents will go home with them - and the teachers have asked for support in reinforcing good behaviour.

I don't know if you could ask about this kind of thing when you next have a meeting, it certainly doesn't seem right she is getting such a label so early in her school experience!

Absolutely agree with Al1son, in fact I would withdraw consent for the behavior diary unless they agree to a more balanced, positive-reinforcement, nurturing approach. They are labeling her and she is playing to type. You really need to step in and break this cycle.

Your poor dd

All, Thanks so much for your replies.

Went into school on friday afternoon. Told them that this diary system is obviuosly not working as planned. The teacher agreed completely. Told her that the reward chart was working very well at home so she is implementing a reward system in school with a view to getting 5 crysals in a pot for good behaviuor then she is allowed to do something she really enjoys. Hopefully her behaviour will improve with this tactic.
Thanks again.xxx