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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

insomnia in a five year old

9 replies

ArcticLemming · 10/02/2011 10:05

My DD really struggles to go to sleep. We put her to bed at around 7-7.30, but she is often still awake at 9.30. Sometimes she lies in bed, and sometimes she wonders about a bit, but she's not being "naughty" - she just can't seem to drop off. This has happened before for short periods, but has now gone on for several months. As a baby / toddler she slept really well. She started school this year and I think finds it quite stressful and difficult to "switch off", but there are no problems per se that I'm aware of and she's doing well and enjoying it.

She certainly needs more sleep - she is shattered in the mornings when it's time to get up and it's really affecting her mood and behaviour.

She's not too cold or hot. She's not hungry and has no health problems. WE have a good routine for going to bed (which she enjoys)and she doesn't seem to mind going to bed. I've tried getting her to talk about anything worrying her and haven't got anywhere. She does get physical exercise which seems to make little difference. Does anyone have any ohter ideas as it's making her really miserable.
Thanks.

OP posts:

Original poster

ArcticLemming · 10/02/2011 10:16

Has anyone ever tried aromatherapy on a child this young - I'm not particularly that way inclined, but am getting desperate!

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Acinonyx · 10/02/2011 10:19

We have a similar situation with dd (5). I aim for 8 but it's too often after 9 before she can get to sleep. I have found it is definitely school-related as it improves a lot in the holidays and then immediately gets worse in term time. She doesn't seem upset by school - I think she just doesn't wind down properly.

We use audiobooks a lot at night - they help her to settle. She hasn't gone to bed before 8 since she was about 2 though - 7-7.30 would be way too early. When does your dd get up? Dh carries dd half-asleep downstairs at 7.15. I think if she could be asleep 8-8.30 she would be fine. But later than that - she looks tired.

I would be tempted to move bed time later - but work on keeping her settled IN bed after that - maybe with soft music or stories. I do worry about dd's sleep.

Original poster

ArcticLemming · 10/02/2011 10:22

Thans Acononyx. Story books might be a good idea. By the time she's had stories etc. it's usually around 7.45 before she's actually settling to go to sleep, but we could try a bit later. I'd be quite happy if she was asleep by 8.30 - sometimes I'm going to bed at 10.30 and she's still awake! Lke you we carry dd downstairs at 7.15, and at weekends she wakes "naturally" around 8 or 8.30am.

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Acinonyx · 10/02/2011 10:27

I spend 30 mins doing stories with her then at 8 she chooses a CD. We have a lot of these now - also great for long car journeys! They can get pricey - look for secondhand.

My theory is that it helps if she actually settles down in bed. Otherwise she gets up and starts playing with stuff and I think that makes it even harder to drop off.

It has been known for us to go to bed before her!

Original poster

ArcticLemming · 10/02/2011 10:44

Thanks - will certainly try this

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polarfox · 10/02/2011 12:02

Try warm milk, hot bath, story time, quiet reading time by her own so that she can unwind.

Also move her bed time bit later, I doubt she'll sleep later...
If you arent tired/destressed it can actually delay sleep.

And dont worry about what time other children go to bed; sleeping needs vary from child to child, and they go through phases too!

Original poster

ArcticLemming · 10/02/2011 12:12

Thanks polarfox - we do most of this, but will certainly try bedtime a bit later. She certainly needs more sleep than she's getting - it's making her quite miserable.

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Smum99 · 23/02/2011 20:15

Artic, I have the same problem with my nearly 5 year old son. He's never been a brilliant sleeper but since starting school he finds it hard to go off to sleep in the evenings. Like you he can be awake when we are trying to sleep. This half term we have noticed an improvement so school must be a factor.

He seems to enjoy school but there does seem to be a problem and his confidence has been impacted so I suspect his lack of sleep is anxiety related, although outwardly you would never guess as he comes across as a very confident and self assured child.

Seriya · 23/02/2011 20:59

I have a related but different problem with my daughter (four). She goes to bed pretty early (in bed by 7, story, then lights out with CD on by 7.15). She usually drops off to sleep no problem.

However, she goes through phases of waking up repeatedly in the middle of the night and then she'll find it difficult to go back to sleep again. She can wake up for all sorts of reasons - too hot, too cold, bad dreams, heard a noise etc. But then she's wide awake and unable to sleep - and shattered and cranky in the morning.

My mum tells me that I never did anything of the sort and all the people she speaks to tell her that kids that age should be sleeping through and clearly there's something amiss because ours doesn't (or at least not always). Could she be right or should I just carry on blithely ignoring her?

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