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Behaviour/development

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Whats happened?!

6 replies

Essie · 12/10/2005 13:12

My Dd has always had a short attention span. She is very very close to her older brother - there is just 12months between them and they have been treated almost like twins in away. But Ds has just started school and is loving his new found independance from her, and she is missing him terribly. Her behalviour has suddenly gone haywire. She flits from one thing to the next to the next within seconds. They even got concerned about it at pre-school and did an assessment on her. Within 10 minutes of being followed around she had done, painting, dressing up, jigsaws, stories, played in the telephone box and shop and gone back to the messy room again to play with the sand and water experiment thingy and not really done anything properly. One night last week she started crying going to bed, covered her ears and said 'mummy, I can't turn my listening skills off'!!! I wasn't quite sure how to respond. Felt so sorry for her! She wanders around the house in the afternoons before picking DS up saying - 'I want Harry' or 'wheres my darling Harry' Everything she does, like pictures or making in that time - its always for Harry. Is the lack of concentration or ablilty to stick with one thing for longer than a minute simply her missing her brother - seperation anxiety or something else? I feel all at sea. She is 3.5 and the other thing is still wearing a nappy at night. They are always SO full in the morning I just haven't attempted it. Better go. Got to go pick her up from preschool!

OP posts:
Essie · 12/10/2005 14:24

The other thing to is that she uses both her left and right hand for different things. left for writing/drawing. right for cutting and playing. left for eating.

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QueenVictoria · 12/10/2005 14:40

Awwwww. Sounds so sweet - although i know that you are worried about it.

Perhaps (I dont know much about these things my DD is 2.6 and DS 6mths) she has just got used to her older brother directing play and needs to learn to amuse herself? My DD uses both hands for various things, i dont see it as a problem.

I dont know what to suggest but i hope it all works out okay!

ScreamEagle · 12/10/2005 15:00

I wouldn't worry about her being ambidextrous, i think a lot are at that age. Aslo the nappy at night time is normal too I think.

I think she misses her brother. Would it help if you took her out of the house to do an activity such as swimming or to the park. Could you hook up with a friend with a child of the same age so she has someone to play with other than her brother?

At home make a point of sitting with her when she does puzzles or drawing to keep her at that activity for say 10 minutes before moving on to something else. How about doing something completely different to what she would expect at home such as baking.

Just had another thought. If she wants to do something for Harry let her then put it on the side to give him when he gets home, then try to focus her as a bove on other things. Give it time. Good luck!

blossom2 · 12/10/2005 15:36

my DD1 who is the same age as your DD, does all the things you described (short attention span, nappy at night) and she is the eldest. i've just been thinking that its normal for her age...

Essie · 12/10/2005 15:54

Thanks everyone. Will def try and spend time 'doing stuff' with her. We are going out with one of her friends for lunch tomorrow - we'll see how it goes. I think I got concerned when the pre-school approached me about it. I was aware of it at home, and hadn't worried too much, but after saying they could do their assessment and hearing their 'findings' it just made me worry that I have a 'problem'. So thanks for the reassurance. We also have a 7 month baby too that she adores and wants to help with which could be a helpful diversion.

I think that is also sometimes hard for her when babe takes up 'her time' at home - what with feeding, nappies etc etc. Oh its all swings and roundabouts! Phases that pass!!!!

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ScreamEagle · 12/10/2005 20:27

You're right, it will pass - you just have to bide your time!

fwiw I sometimes think nurseries have to find something to report on iyswim? They are much more answerable now than they ever were in the past. 10 years ago this may not even warranted a mention.

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