Nephew diagnosed as having 'learning difficulties'

[wahwahwah]

Not sure what to make of it.

He is almost 3 and only says a few words (about 10). Not sure if he can't or won't.
He is in a bilingual environment.

He does not know his colours or numbers. He does understand when you talk to him - so if I ask him to fetch his teddy bear, he will.

He makes eye contact, but is a little shy of peopel he doesn't know well, and goes to nursery but plays with himself. He is happy enough - not showing any signs of frustration at not communicating. His doctor has suggested sending him to a 'special school'.

His parents are beside themselves. Any suggestions for how they should approach this?

What country are you in? Has he had a formal assessment by a pediatrician?

That's how my perfectly normally developed eldest was at that age. Kids under three normally play alongside others than with them. I'd ask for a second opinion.

I work for a charity that supports parents of children with additional needs and it seems very strange to me that this 'diagnosis' and recommendation for special school is based on the opinion of a doctor. It takes more than a visit to the doctor for a child to be recommended to attend a school for kids with additional needs. There is an assessment process that he should have gone through including speach therapy. He'd have to have a statement (a full written assessment of his difficulties and needs) in order to go to an additional needs school. Did they take him to the doctor because they were concerned or because a nursery or pre-school suggested it?

My niece and nephew are also both bilingual and it took them a little longer than others to develop their speach.

Your sister/brother should ask for a second opinion, they should speak to their local authority's SEN (Special Educational Needs)team and ask if there is a support group or organisation that they can access to help them through the assessment process and school choices (if it comes to that)

I know that chn from bilingual families often start speaking later. Then they start talking in both languages and often overtake peers. Sounds a bit premature to be talking "special schools". Particularly as he is talking a bit and even if it turns out he is a little delayed a mainstream school with support may be the best place for him.

Maybe find out about organisations in the area who can advise you and support the parents. Sorry I can't be any more help.

My DD has learning difficulties due to a neurological condition that also affects her fine and gross motor skills, short term memory, speech and language and social skills.

She goes to our local village school. Mainstream, with support and therapy. IMHO the doctor is not in a position to say that any 3 year old child will need a placement in a special school.

That would require a statutory assessment by the local education authority and a Statement of Special Educational Needs, naming a special school.

DD's needs are significant, but she was not diagnosed until she started school.

Why has he been seen by a doctor? What has prompted them taking him to see a doctor?

Did the doctor refer the family to a specialist? A normal GP (assuming you are in the UK) would not in my view be able to diagnose something like this... as couldtryharder says it can take quite some time to get a diagnosis.

Honest view... tell the parents not to see that doctor again and to just get on with life. See how things are in 6 months. Children at this age can change quite a bit in a short period of time.

Early intervention can help with some learning difficulties. However for now that I feel would mean making more effort in teaching him to identify objects. As he does not talk much, this could be done by asking him to Get The Yellow Bear when there are say 3 bears of different colours.

He is already attending nursery, so the staff there are probably doing a fair bit of encouraging him to learn about shapes and colours.

Stick with the nursery, he's happy there and the staff know him. Nursery can work on teaching him colours and shapes, via identification and then working on speech.
A special school isn't needed at present and may never be needed once he starts to talk more.